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気持ちい悪い
Something tentacled this way comes
January 1st, 2009 

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YMK > Love by blackmail
(LJ isn't letting me put this under a cut, sorry for the huge post.)

Dedicated to Birdy, who is the B to my F (in a good way, I swear)~ and everyone else at The Alphabet who helped me compile this.

 

I want to be dead
When I’m in bed
I can be so mean
You can beat me

I would like to shame you
I would like to blame you
Just because of my love to you

And
Love itself is just as innocent as roses in May
I know nothing can drive it away

Though
Love itself is just as brief as a candle in the wind
But it’s greedy just like sin

Alone but sane
I am a love suicide


The potential you'll be
You'll never see
Promises you'll only make
Drink up with me now
And forget all about
Pressure of days
Do what
I say
And I'll make you okay
And drive them away
Images stuck in your head

People you've been before
That you don't want around anymore
That push and shove and won't bend to your will
I'll keep them still
See you right back here tomorrow for the next round
Keep this scene inside your head
As the bruises turn to yellow
The  swelling goes down

And if you're ever around
In the city or the suburbs of this town
Be sure to come around
I'll be wallowing in sorrow
Wearing a frown
Like Pierrot the Clown

Saw you crashing round the bay
Never seen you act so shallow
Or look so brown
Remember all the
things you'd say
How your promises rang hollow
As you threw me to the ground


Bound to your side and trapped in silence
Just a possession
Is this sex or only violence
That feeds your obsession?

You send me to a broken state
Where I can take the pain
Just long enough
That I am numb
That I just disappear

So go on, infect me
Go on and scare me to death
Tell me I asked for it
Tell me I'll never forget
You could give me anything but love
Anything but love

Does it feel good tonight?
Hurt me
with nothing
Some sort of sick satisfaction
You get from mind fucking


Blinded by faith I couldn't hear
All the whispers, the warnings so clear.
I see the angels,
I'll lead them to your door.
There's no escape now,
No mercy no more.
No remorse cause I still remember
The smile when you tore me apart.

You took my heart,
Deceived me right from the start.
You showed me dreams,
I wished they'd turn into real.
You broke a promise and made me realize.
It was all just a lie

You will be
The death of me
Yeah, you will be
The death of me

Bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

I wanted freedom
Bound and restricted
I tried to give you up
But I'm addicted

Now that you know I'm trapped
Sense of elation
You'd never dream of breaking this fixation
You will squeeze the life out of me

I want my innocence back
And if you can't pacify me
I will break your bones
You think I'm bluffing, just try me
I will never forget
The words you used to ensnare me
Till my dying day
You'll suffer for this, I swear (I swear)
And I demand

You put my heart back in my hand
And wipe it clean
From the mess you made of me
And I require
You make me free from this desire
And when you leave, I'd better be the innocent
I used to be


I'm Gothic Lolita
And you are a criminal
I'm not even legal
I'm just a dead little girl
But ruffles and laces
And candy sweet faces
Directed your furtive hand
I perfectly understand
So it's my fault?
No, Gothic Lolita

I am your sugar
I am your cream
I am your anti-American dream

I am your sugar
I am your cream
I am your worst nightmare
Now scream


Forced conversation
Hidden agenda
You think we're stupid, how dare you
The rug has not been pulled
Over our eyes you fool
We can see right through

Tip-toeing villian
Eyes in the ceiling
Your false intentions have warn thin
But we've been in your room and in your closet too
We've got one on you

 I think about you
Can't dream without you
I always want more
Trance to the dance tune
under a full moon
And a reason to...

I think you know
Tonight Tonight
Gonna put you, face you, tease you, show you
what I've been waiting for
Sugar cube
Tonight Tonight
gonna make you, face you, pace you, shake you right now to dance floor
First place on a classroom wall.
Every turn of the face can help to break the fall from a domestic disgrace.
Every rumour displaced is lost and found.
A lack of discipline.
One hand to cut the other.
So unprofessional, you're not a friend, you're just a lover.
Nothing exceptional.
This is correctional.

First day in a victim's chair.
Every surface replaced can help to keep you fair for a corrected gaze.
Every feature displayed will match your crowd.
A loss of innocence.
One hand to wash the other.
Be a perfectionist, you're nothing if you're just another. Something material.
This isn't personal.

We have to take this, to be alive.
There's just one life to give and so we strive
To build upon this, this way of rhymes, this book of lives, this custom of doubts.
We all re-adjust from your tastes.
Slipping forward so we feel graced.
This passage that I've misplaced.
Merely existing to stay the same.
Just take this to the extent in which you are living the "morally predictable" way,
Hoping, reaching for blank salvation,
Every second, every hour, of every single day.

Just wait..there's only one, one life, then it's none.
I see gallows built in your name.
Strangling you while you breathe to pray.
You'd rather live and serve.
Die and "be saved"..there's so much you deserve.
You deserve to be..buried deep, to forever sleep.

I'd rather serve in hell, than reign in heaven.

 
Show me sex appeal
Get on your hands and knees
Forget about the meal
It's best to keep me pleased
Imagine, if you will
Our meat on the block
I've got time to kill
So how about a quick fuck?

'Cause all your heads are gonna roll
I've made your misery my goal
So if you want survival
Kneel on my arrival
for this is how I rule the world

Rejected...since day one
My name is...bastard son
I've been damned...so many times I've lost count!
Blue collar...working man
Devises...masterplan
Bi-polar...with a mental side arm

Into the river below...I'm running from the inferno...
They'll think I'm insane but you'll all know my name!
Into the river below...I'm running from the inferno...
I'll take all the blame, the front page and the fame!

Contraption...made up of
Nuts and bolts...creates the
New monster...to burn your family tree down!
Tick-tocking...times up now
Split second...the world frowns
Lonely heart...never had nobody!


 
Spent most of last night dragging this lake
For the corpses of all my past mistakes
Sell me out - the joke's on you
We are salt - you are the wound
Empty another bottle
And let me tear you to pieces
This is me wishing you
Into the worst situations
I'm the kind of kid
That can't let anything go
But you wouldn't know a good thing
If it came up and slit your throat

Your remorse hasn't fallen on deaf ears
Rather ones that just don't care
'Cause I know
That you're in between arms somewhere
Next to heartbeats
Where you shouldn't dare sleep
Now I'll teach you a lesson
For keeping secrets from me

Disarm you with a smile
And cut you like you want me to
Cut that little child
Inside of me and such a part of you
Ooh, the years burn
I used to be a little boy
So old in my shoes
And what I choose is my choice
What's a boy supposed to do?
The killer in me is the killer in you
My love
I send this smile over to you
Disarm you with a smile
And leave you like they left me here
To wither in denial
The bitterness of one who's left alone
You know the games I play
And the words I say
When I want my own way
You know the lies I tell
When you've gone through hell
And I say I can't stay
You know how hard it can be
To keep believing in me
When everything and everyone
Becomes my enemy and when
There's nothing more you can do
I'm gonna blame it on you
It's not the way I want to be
I only hope that in the end you will see
It's the Opheliac in me

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