気持ちい悪い

I never get replies on these things anyway.

Sat, 12 Dec 2009 20:03:33 GMT

surprise!
a holiday treat meme

Gore Screaming Show: First Impressions: Kiika Route

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 02:08:47 GMT

The third and final part of GSS first impressions, this time covering Kiika's route.

START KIIKA ROUTE

Kiika has hardly been mentioned, or seen, in any of the routes so far. She's a polite, well-mannered girl who enjoys astrology and plays the piano, possessing an elegant air about her. She doesn't mind associating with others, but neither she does seek company out, and when upset, Kiika prefers even further isolation, to be alone with her thoughts. She covers up the hurt with her cultured mannerisms.

When Yuka insults her by the well, Kiika asks for Akane and Yamiko to go ahead to the cafe without her. Kiika, once alone, sits by herself in the park, idly lifting herself up on the chin-up bar, looking incredibly forlorn.

When Kyouji finds Kiika at school, she's always reading by herself in a corner, looking content. The first few times, she's reading about constellations--however, he later catches her off guard while she's wearing a sailor fuku and looking at a photograph collection of cats--Kiika is visibly embarrassed by this.

Kyouji: Aren't the cats cute?
Kiika: Y-you think this is something a child reads, don't you...?
Kyouji: Why does that matter? There's no one looking, and I think they're cute too.
Kiika: Thank goodness... Yes, they are cute, aren't they?
Kyouji: Mm, yes. Do you like that uniform?
Kiika: Yes, I really do, but...my mother dislikes it...
Kyouji: I see. But, when you leave home, what adults say shouldn't matter. You can like anything you want.
Kiika: ...
Kyouji: What's wrong?
Kiika: ...Nothing. You're right, of course.

The following day, Kyouji plans to take Kiika out out a date, to the planetarium.

Kiika: ...Is this strange?
Kyouji: No, it's amazing.
Kiika: I really wouldn't mind working here. I would be in the planetarium, taking care of children and making the announcements.
Kyouji: And you would come here by yourself to work?
Kiika: Yes.

Later, he offers to take her home.

Kyouji: I can take you back on the bike.
Kiika: But...
Kyouji: Let's go, it'll be fun.
Kiika: Um, Jinno-kun, it's fine for me to back the usual way. My home's next on the way, after all.
Kiika: Um...my mother...she doesn't like me going out. She's just, a little strange...
Kyouji: I understand. Then, I'll see you tomorrow.
Kiika: I'm very sorry...I...

Kyouji watches as she goes in, while Kiika's mother scolds her for being late--but instead of Kiika telling her about the planetarium, she lies about where she had been.

Following day, Kiika, Kyouji, Akane, and Aoi visit Yuka's house, once again being begged to come in by Momone. Yuka once again scolds Momone for forgetting the tea, but this time, Kiika steals off to the library to read alone. But apparently, Yuka makes a habit of keeping a cabinet full of dildos on display, and Kiika throws caution and rationale to the wind. It's always the elegant types that end up the most sex-starved in these kinds of games, and Kiika's no exception.

What Kiika does with the toy is obvious, despite her internal conflict of how she should just stop and put it back--but she doesn't, even when Yuka walks right in, a smug look on her face. She taunts Kiika, calling her a pervert, saying that she likes masturbating in other people's homes--while Kiika, humiliated, still cannot stop, weakly protesting and begging Yuka not to watch, before she breaks down sobbing. Kiika throws the dildo down and escapes the house, finding refuge in the forest, terrified of Yuka's parting words to her: "I hate you. You're going to die."

Except in the forest, Kiika keeps on touching herself, having lost all resistance against what her body craves, even though she's upset. Kyouji and the others leave Yuka's house to look for Kiika, where they find her, looking ashamed of herself.

Kiika: No...
Akane: There you are. Hey, we found her, you two. We were really worried about you, what happened?
Kiika: Ah...um, I...I...

Kiika can only apologize without explanation, and the group returns to school. Later, Kiika returns home to her mother, who speaks formally to her--even addressing her own daughter with the '-san' suffix. Kiika's mother doesn't show any physical affection or anything beyond mild concern. She doesn't delve into anything deep, making superficial comments--it's clear neither of them emotionally connect.

Kiika's mother: Is there something wrong?
Kiika: No...I just have a lot of homework today...
Kiika's mother: I see. Well then, please continue to study.

Kiika goes up to her room, opening her bag--only to find the same toy she had used at Yuka's mansion. Kiika is shocked, knowing she hadn't stolen it...but she still can't resist. After Kiika's finished, her mother knocks at the door.

Kiika's mother: Kiika-san? I heard your voice--is something wrong?
Kiika: Um...I'm very sorry...I just had a bad dream...I'm very sorry for waking you up...I'm okay now...
Kiika's mother: I see. Good night then.

Once alone, Kiika is confused at this insatiable lust and scared at how the toy inexplicably wound up back with her. She whimpers to herself, "It's not a lie. It was really all just a bad dream. Just a bad dream, that's all. It's not...a lie."

The next day, Kiika doesn't go to school. Aoi, Akane, and Kyouji are concerned, and go to visit her, but Kiika's mother apologizes and tells them that Kiika is still sleeping. With no other choice, they leave for home.

Kyouji, on his way back, gets a phone call while in the park. It's from Kiika, who timidly asks him to meet her there. She arrives shortly after, still looking stressed.

Kiika: ...Dirty. I'm such a dirty girl.
Kyouji: Kiika-san?
Kiika: I'm such a dirty girl. I'm disgusting and perverted. That's why, yesterday--
Kiika: ...That girl will kill me. Because I...'m so dirty. So...Jinno-kun...
Kiika: I think...I don't dislike you...But I--I'm so disgusting--
Kyouji: I can't understand why you'd say that. You're not dirty.
Kiika: ...Really?
Kyouji: Trust me.

And we all know the correct way to comfort a distraught girl is to screw her against a tree in a public park. Kiika and Kyouji go their separate ways afterwards.

Later, Kiika has gotten home and is in her room, still worried.
Kiika: Why? Why am I doing these things? It...must've been a dream. It's always been a dream. No...No, stop...
Despite how much guilt she feels, Kiika continues to masturbate. When this time, her mother walks in during the middle of it, slaps Kiika, demands to know why she's doing such a thing.
--and Kiika wakes up. She's in her bed, alone.
Kiika: That dream again...why...no, I didn't do that...

Kiika looks, and standing there--is herself. The room darkens so she can only see this other Kiika, while she lets out a surprised squeak.

Kiika: No...way...is this...my doppleganger?
Doppleganger!Kiika: What's the matter? Hurry up, come here so I can welcome you.
Kiika: W...why? W-who...are you?
Doppleganger!Kiika: I'm Kiika, of course.
Kiika: I--I am Kiika...don't say such strange things...
Doppleganger!Kiika: I am myself. Of course, all your knowledge is also mine. I understand, you didn't want to be alone here.
Doppleganger!Kiika: I'm alone. There's nothing wrong with it, there's nothing bad about it.

Doppleganger!Kiika seduces Kiika, but they're interrupted when Gore appears, inciting more confusion. Doppleganger!Kiika has vanished, leaving Kiika alone with Gore and Yuka.

Yuka: How disgusting! What a dirty woman--what kind of human does that?

Gore then proceeds to rape Kiika with a dildo--though after all the sex she had just had, you think it wouldn't hurt.

Gore: Ahahahahaha! I like when they protest!
Yuka: Hahaha! How true! Is she going to die?

--And Kiika awakens. She's so relieved--thank goodness, it was all a dream--the dream about her mother was a dream within a dream, the doppleganger of herself was a dream, Gore was a dream--

...But--but wait, wasn't she wearing different pajamas, earlier--?

It wasn't a dream.

Kiika screams in horror and despair at the realization, and her defeated cry has woken her mother.

Kiika's mother: Kiika-san? What's this screaming about? What's wrong?
Kiika: I'm...sorry. I just...had a horrible dream. I got scared....
Kiika's mother: You've been having those often lately, haven't you? Is there something going on at school?
Kiika: No, nothing like that...
Kiika's mother: Oh?
Kiika: I'm...really alright now.
Kiika's mother: No, I can see you don't look alright. What are you worrying about? Is there something happening, after all?
Kiika: Please! Don't ask anymore!
Kiika's mother: Kiika? But--
Kiika: It's...nothing. I'm...going to go back to sleep. So, please--

A phone call interrupts, and Kiika's mother goes to get it, telling Kiika to try and not worry. Once left alone, Kiika whimpers, overwhelmed, vowing to go to school as soon as possible tomorrow, and meet Kyouji there.

The following day, Kiika quietly greets Kyouji, looking distraught. They meet in the astrology clubroom, where Kyouji offers to take her to the planetarium again. Kiika says that her mother wouldn't approve, and grows more and more upset, on the verge of tears at the thought of never enjoying things like that ever again. The bell rings, but neither of them go to class.

Kiika: I...I am so sorry...I might not...be around anymore...

She leaves Kyouji behind, wrapping her arms around herself, keeping her nightmares inside, bottling up her fear. After school, Kyouji meets Kiika in front of a convenience store.

Kiika: Thank goodness...I thought you wouldn't come.
Kyouji: What? Of course I would.
Kyouji: Let's go. Would it be okay if we got back by nine?
Kiika: (smiles) It'll probably be okay if we get back by then.

They go into the forest, admiring scenery and watching the stars, when it starts raining heavily. The couple has to take shelter under a tree, and Kiika seems to be feeling better at last. They make idle chatter--until Yuka interrupts, appearing behind Kiika, resting her face in her hands. Kiika looks distressed, not saying a word.

Kyouji: What's wrong, Kiika-san?
Yuka: ...Onee-chan, you're still together with Onii-chan?
Yuka: That dirty woman stinks...Kyouji, you're still with her?
Yuka: Disgusting. All you do is masturbate. And you still insist on being dirty in front of Kyouji?
Kiika: A...ah...
Kyouji: You bitch, watch what you say!
Yuka: You masturbate, constantly. How disgraceful! You dirty girl, it would be better if you died.
Kiika: ...!
Yuka: That girl--that girl--I hate her! You're the dirtiest one of all.
Yuka: You're a regular person, aren't you? Yet all you do is so digusting, disgusting, disgusting!
Yuka: You're the most revolting, aren't you? Because that's all you do. Have you no decency? Where are you going to masturbate next?!
Yuka: ...Just die.
Kiika: No...Noooo!

Kiika runs further into the forest, chased by Yuka--where she's found by Yoshiki. Yoshiki watches Yuka with fury, while Yuka is impassive.

Yoshiki: It's been a long time.
Yuka: Who are you?
Yoshiki: You may not remember, but that doesn't matter. Where's your friend--that monster?

Yuka grins, but is quickly running out of patience for Yoshiki. Yoshiki draw out his gun, shooting at Yuka--but she vanishes, leaving Yoshiki, Kyouji, and Kiika alone in the forest. Yoshiki drives them back home.

That night, Kiika has a nightmare about being attacked by Gore.

The following evening, Kiika and her mother are outside of Kyouji's house. Kiika clearly doesn't want to be there, while Kiika's mother looks furious.

Kiika's mother: Kiika, why did you come here? Tell your mother.
Kiika: No...
Kiika's mother: Kiika! You won't answer to mother?!
Kiika: Noo! Don't come near me! Don't come near me!

Yamiko then interrupts the stressful situation, 'explaining' things to Kiika's mother, smooth-talking her until she finally leaves. Yamiko invites Kiika inside, and asks her to explain everything.

Kiika: I...was alone in my room. But...then I wasn't...
Kiika: Um...I really saw my doppleganger, so....won't I die?

She recalls Yuka's words: "When you see your doppleganger, you'll die."

Yoshiki: Did your doppleganger say anything to you? Where did you see it?
Kiika: I...but...
Yoshiki: Tell me. You're in danger if you saw it. Your life is jepordized.
Yamiko: Hey, Kiika-chan, you don't want to tell all of us, so how about a woman-to-woman talk?

After Kiika's confessed everything, Yoshiki gives Kyouji the same pendant that's so precious to Yuka. Kiika doesn't go home that night, knowing Yuka will go after her. Kyouji ends up confessing his love to her, causing her to cry from joy. Even if it's only for a short while, Kiika is at peace.

The next day, Kiika acts cheerfully during school. She and Kyouji walk home together, Kyouji giving her the pendant for protection, until Kiika decides it's time to go back home.

--But when she opens the door, her house seems unusually...dark. It's only evening, but all the lights are off.

Kiika: Mother? I've come home. I won't leave like that again, but--
Kiika: ...Mother?
Kiika's mother: Welcome home, Kiika. ...Ooh, what a pretty pendant. Where did you get that?
Kiika: This is...something the teacher gave to me during counseling. It's used for healing.
Kiika's mother: Is that so...let your mother take a closer look.
Kiika: Y...Yes. Here--
Kiika's mother: Don't touch it.
Kiika: Eh?
Kiika's mother: I can't see it that way. Put it on the table.

Kiika: ...Why?
Kiika's mother: Put it on top of that table.
Kiika: ...But why?
Kiika's mother: Put it on the table.
Kiika: ...
Kiika's mother: Put it on the table.

Kiika: You...
Kiika's mother: Put it on the table.
Kiika: You...are not my mother.
Kiika's mother: Put it on the table.
Kiika: ...!
Yuka: Enough...Gore, she won't do it, as I thought.
Kiika: You--!

During this incredibly creepy exchange, Kiika's mother goes from a normal expression, to manically smiling, to full-out bulging, unfocused eyes, grinning with a bloody wound on her face. Kiika screams, but there's no escape.

Akane and Kyouji hear her, and rush to Kiika's house--to find it empty. While Akane stays with Yamiko, Kyouji and Yoshiki go to the next most likely location--Yuka's mansion.

Momone is at the door when they enter. She makes a weak noise in her throat.

Yoshiki: Is this where your 'daughter' is?
Momone: Ah...ah...a...h...
Momone: Ahhhh! She killed everyone! She killed Saiyumi and Hi-kun, she killed Momone too...!
Momone: Yuka is here--

As Yoshiki and Kyouji head further into the house, they can hear Momone's scream.

Momone: Noooooo! I'm so sorry, so very, very sorry, Yuka, have mercy!

Yoshiki reaches for his gun, managing to shoot Yuka. She whimpers on the floor, sobbing.

Yuka: It's hurts so much...how cruel...why, would you do that?

Kyouji yells at Yoshiki to stop shooting, but he doesn't listen.

Kyouji: Do you want to kill her?!
Yoshiki: This is for Saiyumi--this is for my wife.
Kyouji: What could this child have done to your wife?!
Yoshiki: Take a good look. Can you not see what this girl really is?
Yuka: It's hurts! It's huuurts! Ithurts, ithurtsithurtsithurts!!

Yoshiki shoots several more times, until Yuka can only moan weakly.

Yuka: Kyouji...it hurts...
Yuka: Kyouji...you think of Yuka as pitiful, don't you?...So...
Yuka: Will you...kill that man?

Yuka smiles and vanishes--right when Gore appears. Yoshiki shoots at Gore, but it has no effect. Yuka reappears as Yoshiki's running low on bullets, smiling and on her feet.

Yuka: That won't do anything. Are you an idiot?
Yoshiki: Brave words for someone who was just screaming how much it hurt.
Yuka: Shut up.
Yuka: Fine...so then, Kyouji? Kyouji, you'll stay here with Yuka?
Kyouji: Where's Kiika?
Yuka: You want to meet her? Do you like that girl?
Yoshiki: Let's go.
Yuka: That's right. Gore--

Gore appears, with an unconcious, unharmed Kiika.

Yuka: Kyouji really likes that girl. I can't understand why anyone would like this dirty girl, but Kyouji likes her, right? That's why I'm going to kill her, just wait.

Yoshiki shoots at them, causing Gore to abandon Kiika as he and Yuka vanish.

Kyouji, carrying Kiika, escapes, running into the forest, towards the shopping district--when Yuka appears--and they are back inside the mansion. Yoshiki has been injured by Gore, as he fruitlessly tries to shoot him, and instead, starts a blaze inside Yuka's mansion. Yuka watches all of this, before speaking to Kyouji in a pained voice.

Yuka: Yes...yes, that's right...Kyouji, you've forgotten about me.
Kyouji: Forgotten? What are you saying?
Yuka: That's why--I'm going kill that dirty girl now!
Kiika: Nooo!
Yuka: Hahaha! Die, disgusting woman!

But before she can move, Yoshiki grabs Yuka and holds her down, despite her struggles. They burn alive in the mansion together, as Kyouji and Kiika escape.

The following day, Kiika runs to Kyouji during school, crying as she tells him:

Kiika: Y-Yuka-chan didn't die...that m-monster didn't die...why?!
Kiika: J-just as I thought--I am disgusting--That's why--that's why--

Kyouji protests as kiika sobs, but the school before them has been transformed--into the empty, red landscape seen in Akane's route, filed with staring eyes, and nothing else.

Kyouji: This is--
Yuka: This is Gore's world
Gore: This is Yuka's world.
Gore: This is Gore's world, this is Yuka's world, this this this this this this ahahahahahahaha!

Yuka and Gore stand there, completely unharmed.

Kyouji: You're--supposed to be dead--
Gore: Yuka didn't die! Gore didn't die!
Kyouji: You--what the hell are you?!
Yuka: Kyouji, you're stupid, aren't you? That dirty girl--it would be better if we killed her.
Gore: All she does is masturbate! She's still dirty--kill her! kill her! "Ahh, stop, stop, mother! Noooo!"
Kyouji: Shut up...
Kyouji: Shut up, shut up!

The next moment, Kyouji's back in the school. Kiika is beside him, looking worried.

Kiika: Kyouji...-kun?
Kiika: What's...wrong?
Kyouji: Nothing--

Gore appears, standing behind Kiika--who doesn't seem to notice anything, nor hear Gore's voice. Kyouji screasm at her to run--but then finds himself at his desk in the classroom. The background turns a sinsiter red, and he beholds Kiika held aloft by Gore's...tentacles. Kiika screams for Kyouji--but Gore then declares it meal time--

And bites off Kiika's head.

Yuka: No, no, Gore. You've already had lunch.
Gore: Mmmm! I'm sorry, Yuka-chan, I'm sorry Yuka, but she's so delicious.
Yuka: I'm glad you think it's yummy, Gore!

Kyouji wakes up in the nurse's office--this time, Kiika's nowhere ot be found. He walks home, and falls asleep--only to be greeted by Yuka, speaking softly to him, standing in the middle of the red landscape.

Yuka: Kyouji will always be with me, right?

She whimpers, on the verge of tears when Kyouji replies he'll remember her if she brings back Kiika. Without a word, Yuka vanishes with a sad, defeated look.

The next day, Kyouji wakes up, and receives a phone call. Putting the phone to his ear, he hears Kiika screaming. After that, only Sadashima can be heard, taunting Kyouji.

Sadashima: I wonder where she could be?
Kyouji: Don't fuck with me! Tell me where she is!

Kyouji hurries to school, finding Sadashima there with Kiika. He tries to get to her, only to be punched, hard.

Yuka: This is for real this time.

Yuka and Gore appear, while Sadashima looks triumphant at their entrance. Kyouji is still struggling to get near Kiika.

Yuka: It's useless. She won't wake up.
Yuka: At last, I'll kill that girl you love so, so much. Kyouji, you'll remember everything now?
Sadashima: First, you need that pendant, right?
Yuka: That's right. Get it.
Yuka: What's wrong? Hurry up and give it to me.
Sadshima: No...it's...
Kyouji: Kiika! Kiika, Kiika! Wake up! Are you fine with dying here?! I would hate that; I still want to talk with you, I still want to see you!
Yuka: What you are waiting for?! Hurry up!
Yuka: Fine! I--
Gore: Yuka, it's dangerous! Yuka will get hurt; don't!

Yuka ignores Gore, reaching for the pendant herself--and screams in agony. Kiika then awakens just as Yuka recoils, sobbing.

Yuka: It hurts...it--it hurts so much...Gore...Gore...help me...
Kiika: Kyouji, let's go.

They escape into the hallway, running for their lives to get as far away from Yuka as possible.

Kiika: Kyouji-kun.
Kyouji: What?
Kiika: I heard you calling for me. Thank you.

They are suddenly blocked--not by Yuka or Gore, but by the principal, Aoi, and Akane. They all smile, not saying anything, but Kyouji is wary, knowing that they are but Gore's puppets now. They break through, continuing to race through the school as it slowly slips into the red dimension.

They find shelter in the astrology club room, only to see it filled with disembodied eyes--Kiika panics and Kyouji tries to break through the exit, the room just getting more and more and more crowded--

The next moment, the room is back to normal.

Kiika: Was that...a dream just now?
Kyouji: Those two can make us see anything they want. It wasn't a dream.

Sadashima has somehow gotten into the room as well, standing in the shadows.

Sadashima: Hey, hey, Jinno. Are you still angry? Hey, I've been awful lately. I understand how I've been acting now, H-hey, please say something! Somehow, you know how to beat that monster, right? Please, forgive me. I won't bully you or Misono anymore, so you've got to help me.
Kyouji: You don't know, do you?
Sadashima: Eh? What's that?
Kyouji: Even now, you still don't know how much you've hurt us.
Sadashima: What're you--twalking abwwouff? I'm shiriush--plweasf?

Sadashima steps out of the shadows, revealing the monstrosity he's become. His face is mutilated and disorted, like wax melted wrong, one eye gaping, one ear completetly out of allignment, his mouth open and revealing missing teeth. It's impossible to say where the blood is coming from, as it gushes down and stains the front of his clothes.

Yuka giggles, delighted.

Yuka: Are you having fun?
Kyouji: Stop it--are you going to do to me what you did to Sadashima?!
Yuka: This guy--(Sadashima screams) I had a lot of fun with, but there's still half of his human side left--if I had the pendant, I think I could fix him, but--
Yuka: But, I already used the pendant on that disgusting girl, so it may already be too late.
Yuka: Gore, are you going to eat lunch? Or are men too bland?
Gore: It's not tasty--too bland!
Yuka: I see. Then, do what you like. Ah--but not to Kyouji. You can have the dirty girl, and that idiot--but not Kyouji.

Gore, instead of listening to Yuka, abruptly howls and reaches for the pendant.

Yuka: Gore! Why are you doing that? Gore, that will really hurt us! Has it been so long that you've--

Kiika slaps Yuka, while Sadshima give one more tortured cry.

Sadashima: Jwiffnno--
Kyouji: Sadashima!
Sadashima: Jinfwo...Iff's hot...sho hof-- (the mutilated Sadashima has spontaneously burst into flame, and the fire begins to swallow the clubroom)
Yuka: (giggling) Why? This guy hated Kyouji. Kyouji, you hate him too, right? It's so funny!
Yuka: ...What is it, Kyouji? Why are you looking at me like that?
Kyouji: I remember you.
Yuka: (her smiles fades, and instead looks shocked) ...What?

This is enough to shock Yuka so that she stumbles back, and Kyouji tries to run.

Yuka: It's useless. No one can leave here! Yuka won't leave either!
Yuka: That girl will die if Kyouji doesn't save Yuka!
Kyouji: I'm not going to help you. You need to see that right now, right here, you're going to die. (tries to break the door down)
Yuka: ...! (sobs)
Kiika: Kyouji-kun, one more time!
Kyouji: Right!
Yuka: Kyouji...
Kyouji: Kiika, this'll just take a second.
Yuka: Kyouji...! Don't leave me!
Kyouji: (breaking down the door)
Yuka: Don't leave me, Kyouji!

Kyouji and Kiika break down the door, leaving behind Yuka as she still calls for Kyouji, before the fire envelops her, and she shrieks. Kyouji remembers the first time Yuka had been caught in a fire--when Yoshiki held her down, sacrificing his life to ensure her death. Kyouji and Kiika break through windows and burst through doors, eventually making it out of the school.

They watch as the fire spreads to the whole school, the entire building burning, flames reaching to the stars.

The fire abruptly stops, and then they are thrust back into the red-skied version of the world, before it vanishes completely--signifying that Yuka, and her red dimension, are gone for good.

Exhausted, Kyouji returns home, as Yamiko welcomes him.

The prologue explains the school had been rebuilt, and Sadashima had revived, with no one except those directly involved remembering anything.

Kiika: Sadashima and the others, even though they don't remember, it wasn't a lie.
Kyouji: I know.

It's twilight, and Kyouji and Kiika are walking together in the park. Kiika seems to have finally moved on for good, talking about how she's moving to England with her mother, in order to be with her father.

Kiika: We'll be alright, won't we?
Kyouji: You really will.
Kiika: I'll email you.
Kyouji: So will I.
Kiika: (smiling) Liar, the others will keep you busy. You guys are going to be in your third year of school. But please write when you can.
Kyouji: I will, no matter the time.
Kiika: --Ah! Snow...
Kyouji: It is snowing...Hey, what're you laughing at?!
Kiika: It's just, you looked so cute, Kyouji-kun.

Kyouji returns home to tell Yamiko the news.

Yamiko: Ahh, Kiika-chan's becoming an adult~ Kyouji, you sure you're okay with this?
Kyouji: ...
Yamiko: Are you sure that you won't always miss Kiika-chan?
Kyouji: I'll never forget her.
Yamiko: Ooh? Are you going out to play?
Kyouji: Yeah, that's right! Thanks, Yamiko!
Yamiko: ...Eh? Eh? I was just joking...
Kyouji: It'll be okay. No matter what happens.

END KIIKA ROUTE

Personally, although Kiika's route is fantastic, I find Kiika's character to be the weakest. The lack of cross-cast interaction (for example, the impact of Akane in Aoi's route) left me feeling disappointed--even though this is intended, given Kiika is purposely distant. Also, Kiika seemed the very dependent on Kyouji the entire route. Aoi stopped running away and was resolved of her hatred, Akane was willing to sacrifice herself to keep others safe, but Kiika kept coming back, over and over, to Kyouji. Naturally, she was under a huge amount of strain as Yuka psychologically messed with her so badly she couldn't tell reality from dreams, along with constant verbal abuse, but Kiika was the one who kept playing with herself, inviting more trouble. She didn't actively resist it, instead coming back to self-pleasure as if it were an addiction. I mean, I know, hormones kick in, but if she knew the danger it would bring, why would Kiika repeatedly submit? Yuka would torture her anyway, but Kiika gave her one more excuse.

Gore Screaming Show: First Impressions: Aoi Route

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 01:49:07 GMT

Part two of GSS first impressions, this time covering Aoi's route.

START AOI ROUTE

Aoi is much more withdrawn than Akane, to the point of almost being socially cripped. She has few interests, about devotes a great deal of her time to them. Aoi is a fan of music, listening to it at school as well as carrying a CD player with her everywhere. When Kyouji discovers Aoi likes heavy metal, he invites her to a concert--which she eventually accepts, looking almost alarmed at the offer. They go to the concert and have desert together, and Kyouji decides to play the stuffed animal grabbing game. Aoi looks frantic at this, but ends up cheering Kyouji on--she looks scared at the thought of playing a mere game. Enthusiasm and flattery is so new to her, she doesn't know how to react.

Later, Akane befriends the class bully and playboy, being seduced by his gentlemanly facade. He tries to do the same thing to Aoi, but she is uneasy, resisting the offer, growing bolder as she screams that he doesn't really like Akane, when the bully drops the charm and starts speaking in an incredibly rude manner, trying to cast doubt on the truth of Aoi's words.

Akane, however, helps Aoi when she is knocked down, telling off the bully and looking furious. --However, when the bully still invites her to a party at his house, Akane accepts, trying to distract him to get him to leave Aoi alone.

On their walk home, Kyouji asks Aoi if she's okay, but this ends up upsetting her.

Aoi: You're really a good guy...but I don't understand, why you're so kind to me!

Aoi runs off, on the verge of tears. Here, I make the assumption that Aoi suffers from something I like to call the Aeka Syndrome, named after another character who has also the social outcast in her school, was considered withdrawn and strange by others, and became uneasy when anyone tried to romantically advance on her. Like Aeka, I wonder if Aoi will also manifest psychotic tendencies, this dark side brought on by the stress of familial issues and constant emotional and physical pain, or if she will try to take her own life, as Aeka did. However the two are not exactly alike. Aeka is not above threatening her life in order to pressure the protagonist into date her, while Aoi doesn't put herself in danger, and instead, seems willing to let her relationship with Kyouji take the fall. Aoi talks back to her bullies--while Aeka doesn't do the same until the one she loves is in danger. Aeka also becomes increasingly violent, vaguely hinting to her tormentor that she had better kill her, unless she wanted to die.

Thus, I would say that Aeka is a shrinking violet who, under the strain of isolation from any kind of love and acceptance, desperately clings to the shred of kindness she is given, and will do anything to keep it--even force the protagonist into it. When Aeka herself threatens her relationship, she tries to throw herself off the school roof in a second suicide attempt, because she felt that, if Kohei didn't love her, she would grow to hate him, and try to murder him herself. At the same time, her love for him is painful, since she has be coercing him into a relationship--thus, she concludes, the best thing is to disappear. She doesn't care about herself, only if Kohei is happy--and it's only when Kohei is hurt does she snap, first trying to kill herself out of guilt, and then letting loose the violence that has been building up inside, giving a big 'fuck you' to morals as Aeka richly finds her vengeance against those who've wronged her.

While Aoi is also a shrinking violet, but one who falls under the 'emotionless girl' category rather than the 'blossoming yandere'. Aoi stands up (to least somewhat) to her bullies, and defends herself when she's talked about badly. She refuses to be violent, and seems alright with continuing her lonely existence. But this is still the beginning of the path, so Aoi may develop more symptoms of the Aeka Syndrome as she goes on.

Back at the "party", we are shown nothing but a dark room, with the bully standing in front of Akane, while other male classmates surround her.

Akane: Sadashima-kun--what did you--put in the juice--?!
Sadashima: Are you an idiot, Kazuyagi? Didn't you realize? What Namiki said wasn't a lie. Well, it was a shock for Namiki to suddenly speak up like that at school, so no one would believe it...
Akane: Stop it already!
Sadashima: (slaps Akane) Why don't you grow up a bit--
Akane: (kicks Sadashima in the crotch, hands on her hips) What the hell is this?! Sadashima-kun, I'll never ever forgive you!
Sadashima: (follows after) Wait, Kazuyagi! I'm worry, it was my mistake. I'll never do it again.
Akane: Wait are you saying? Stop lying already!
Sadashima: No, I really messed up. That's why--

Sadashima's smile fades as his expression turns furious, punching Akane and forcing her to the floor. Akane ends up getting gang-raped, and while she's screaming at them to stop, she calls out for Kyouji, but as time goes by and it still hasn't ended, Akane is losing her grip on sanity.

Akane: Kyouji...? Kyou...ji...
Akane: No more. I don't care anymore. Hurry up and kill me.

The scene fades out while her torment is still going on, and Akane's still hoping.

But Kyouji never comes.

The following day, Kyouji and Aoi meet in the hallway, awkwardly mumbling greetings, yesterday evening still on their minds. Sadashima is grinning when they enter the classroom, incredibly pleased. Akane isn't in school, and the classroom is thick with tension. Aoi is suspicious and immediately fears the worst. Kyouji, also worried, confronts Sadashima about it.

Kyouji: What did you do with Akane?
Sadashima: ...Hmf.
Kyouji: Answer me!
Sadashima: Hmmm. So you really do like Kazuyagi.
Kyouji: ...
Sadashima: (takes out his cell phone) See this?

On the screen plays a video of Akane being raped. Kyouji absolutely flips his shit, but Sadashima and his cronies don't give him a chance to react, instead start beating the hell out of him, screaming at him to die.

Hey, remember that dream Kyouji had in Akane's route? He once again has a flashback to that scene where he's forced on her, remembering little Akane's screams--before he comes back to reality moments later, and the memory passes. Kyouji has been left wounded, where Aoi discovers him.

Aoi: Please, wait just a minute! I'm going to get help!
Kyouji: Wait. I've realized something just now...
Kyouji: I've done something horrible to Akane...it's my fault...
Aoi: No. You're wrong, you're wrong. It's my fault. I didn't go with Akane-chan...and because of that, she was alone with Sadashima-kun...

That evening, we see Sadashima and the rest of his underlings walking home, but are stopped when Yuka greets them. Sadashima, in typical asshole fashion, grabs her and proceeds to gangrape her with his cronies (though Yuka ends up getting off on the pain). Near the end, however, she gruesomely disembowels the boys while they're still in her.

Bullies: (screaming in agony)
Yuka: (giggling) You guys are so funny!
Yuka: (when she gets no reply from the corpses) You guys are just as stupid as I thought.

Couldn't have happened to a nicer bunch. The following day, in addition to Akane, Sadashima's followers are also missing, but Sadashima himself is there, grinning unnaturally. Kyouji notices it, ordinary classmates notice, even Sadashima's fangirls notice. However, the class goes without incident, save the announcement that Akane has been admitted to a hospital, and Aoi and Kyouji take a walk after school, Akane weighing heavily on their minds.

Aoi: I'm sorry...I didn't mean that Kyouji is bad or anything...
Kyouji: It's fine. I think I did the right thing...that guy, after what he did to Akane...
Aoi: Yes...the bad one is me. I should've...
Kyouji: ...We can go visit her, just to be a little closer.
Aoi: ...
Kyouji: Shall we go?

They end up walking to the hospital, but as they make their way through the forest, it starts raining. And who else is there to find them, but Yuka. She offers them shelter from the rain in her house, saying they could phone someone from there and that her mother has already cooked dinner anyway. Very reluctantly, Kyouji and Aoi agree.

Once inside, Aoi changes into the new clothes set out for her, and Kyouji calls his aunt--and recieves a shock.

Kyouji: It's raining really hard, so we're now in the house covered in ivy. Could you come and gets us?
Yamiko: ...Rain? What are you talking about, Kyouji? The weather's fine.
Kyouji: Wait, what are you saying? It's raining right now.
Yamiko: Ehh? The sky's so beautiful, there's no way it's raining. Stop kidding, okay~?

Gore's chilling laughter interrupts the conversation, and the line goes dead. Instead of telling Aoi the truth, Kyouji reassures her that Yamiko will be coming. Momone then requests they follow her to Yuka's room, who is surprised Kyouji hasn't changed clothes.

Yuka: Ehhh? Why? The clothes would've made you look like a prince!
Kyouji: I'm waiting for Aunt Yamiko.
Yuka: Ahh~ But look, aren't I like the white rabbit?
Aoi: A white rabbit?
Yuka: That's right. I'm the March hare, mother is the mouse, and Onee-chan is Alice!
Kyouji: What the hell is that?
Aoi: Do you mean Alice in Wonderland?

Yuka then takes them to meet someone, despite Kyouji's protests. He tries to convince Momone to come, but she refuses, cowering in fear of what is to come. Yuka tells him to hurry, saying their guest is already here.

Kyouji refuses, saying they need to go, and Yuka relinquishes.

Yuka: You're the mouse!
Aoi: I'm the mouse?
Yuka: Yep! Bye-bye! Good-night! Mother, lead them to their room!

Kyouji and Aoi are just settling down later, when they are interrupted by Gore--the first time they've actually met him in this route. Kyouji is appropriately freaked out, while Yuka appears, cheering Gore on. Gore has two puppets resembling Kyouji and Aoi, gesturing with the Aoi doll as he speaks from her perspective.

Gore: (using Aoi doll) Nice to meet you! My name is Aoi---! Namiki Aoi! The truth is--um--that is, I--
Gore: (using Kyouji doll) What is it? Hurry up and say it.
Gore: (Aoi doll) But--it's so difficult--but, Aoi, Kyouji-kun, I want Kyouji-kun to look at me--no, nevermind! I can't say it!
Gore: (Aoi doll) The truth is, I hate Kazuyagi Akane! I can never be included between the two of you!
Aoi: N...no...that's not true...No! I don't hate her! Akane-chan is--Akane-chan is--
Gore: (Aoi doll) My father is dead! My big brother is dead! She only feels sorry for me! I hate when she pities me! But now, I'm so glad! Now she doesn't have any friends and she doesn't go to class! She doesn't have anything!
Aoi: No...! No!!

Gore vanishes with Aoi's scream, and Kyouji tells Aoi to escape with him.

Yuka: Now wasn't that fun?
Kyouji: Why did you have him say those lies?!
Yuka: They weren't lies. Everything was true. That's what she really feels in her heart.

Aoi and Kyouji get out of their room into the hallway, and they start running towards the exit. They make it to the front hall--but when he looks again, he and Aoi are separated by a mirror. Try as he might, the surface won't break, and by now, Yuka and Gore have caught up.

Gore continues with his puppet show as Aoi screams at him to stop, and Kyouji once again flashes back to the incident when he and Akane were little.

Yuka: Kyouji, do you understand what she's really like now? She doesn't like you, she just wants everything of yours!

Aoi: Yes, I pity myself. I have nothing good about myself. I hate myself. I can't be anywhere. I don't care about anyone.
Aoi: But...Jinno-kun, I...please, go back.

Aoi disappears behind the mirror, while Yuka laughs triumphantly at Aoi's death. Yuka order's Kyouji to vanish as well--but instead of vanishing, he remains there. Yuke and Gore both are confused, trying to figure out what had just happened, when Yoshiki breaks through the front door--just in time to see Momone get devoured by Gore--given that Momone was someone Yoshiki was looking for, Yuka deliberately singled her out. But all Yoshiki says is, "How do you feel, now that you've killed your little sister?"

Yoshiki tells Kyouji to get out of there, but Kyouji refuses to leave, not when Aoi is gone.

Yuka: It's useless, that girl's already disappeared!
Yoshiki: ...She went somewhere?
Yuka: That's right. I wonder where she went.

Yoshiki, while Kyouji is conflicted, shoots at Gore and Yuka. Yoshiki grabs Kyouji, and they escape while Yuka is on the floor, moaning in pain, weakly begging for Gore to save her.

They run into the forest, Kyouji thinking about only Aoi, when there's a crackling sound and a blaze of heat. Looking back, Kyouji sees Yuka's house in flames.

The following day, Kyouji attends Aoi's funeral, but despite its tragic occasion, no one who knew Aoi is there. Old women are gossiping about Aoi, and Aoi's mother expresses nothing but ecstasy, laughing wildly during the ceremony.

Kyouji opens a wooden box presented to him--and finds inside the stuffed animal he won for Aoi on their first and only date. The funeral guests, meanwhile, are developing Gore's speech style and speaking gibberish, a sure sign of the would becoming more chaotic and distorted--just as Aoi's mother has already been driven insane, the guests too are succumbing. Akane--now recovered--and Kiika enter, looking grim. But all Kyouji can think of is the face of the girl trapped behind the mirror, even as he tries to make sense of the world that is rapidly careening to hell in a handbasket.

Kyouji leaves this hideous mockery of a funeral, walking back to school, where everything seems normal--but with the cry of "the teacher's coming", it's a harbinger of destruction. The classroom slowly is covered with a film of red, and the blue, cloudy sky outside the window is replaced with a bloody ocean of eyes. The teacher talks unnaturally and repeats syllables like a broken record--before turning his gaze to Kyouji, preparing to bring his fist down--

When Kyouji wakes up. The class is back to normal, the sky is blue, the room is dull. He is reprimanded for sleeping by the teacher--Kyouji sighs in relief until Kiika giggles, and the world is abruptly back to the red dimension.

Kiika: What's the matter, Jinno-kun? You shouldn't sleep now, you should've done that last night.

Kyouji had only been dreaming he had woken up in the regular world. He looks at his classmates, who are acting like everything is fine--when he realizes that they are now Gore's puppets. Rushing out into the hall, Yuka's voice is heard, telling Kyouji it's impossible to escape. Kyouji screams, frustrated, frightened, as he runs out of the school--only to reveal the eye-filled sky, stretching as far as he can see.

However, Yoshiki then pulls up, telling Kyouji to get in the car. They drive off, and Yoshiki theories that Yuka's influence extends from her mansion all the way to the school. Kyouji, however, just wants some semblance of normalcy, demanding an explanation for what had just transpired in his school. But none is given.

As they drive further, the sky fades from a normal twilight into the same bloody scenery as everywhere else. They eventually return home, where Kyouji recieves a call. Checking his cell, he sees the message is complete gibberish. Could have been from Aoi?

The next day, Aoi is wandering down the street, which now warped and distorted along with the rest of the red-skied world. Kyouji calls out for her, asking her where she's been, but Aoi doesn't reply. She vanishes--and it is then Kyouji wakes up from his dream.

Getting out of bed, Kyouji turns on the television, only to see static and hear a sales pitch for tomatoes--no matter what channel he changes it to, the advertisement continues--until finally, Gore is gazing out from the television, revealing he was the one talking to Kyouji.

Kyouji turns off the television--only for it to turn itself back on, and Gore continues speaking. Turning it off once more, Kyouji leaves his house, only to see the same nightmarish landscape has gone unchanged. No matter where he goes: the town is smothered by it. He visits the burnt remains of Yuka's home, before venturing elsewhere into the forest, determined to find Aoi.

His cell phone rings, and Kyouji checks it, only to recieve another gibberish message. Convinced that Aoi is sending him the messages, Kyouji find Yoshiki, who drives him to the shopping district--where they meet Gore and Yuka.

Gore injuries Yoshiki, but before he goes down, manages to shoot Yuka. Following that is what can only described as paternal affection laced with bestialic vibes. You know I ship it.

Gore: Yuka!
Yuka: (sobbing) It--it hurts...it hurts so much, but why does it hurt...?

Yoshiki continues to shoot, as Yuka whimpers, gasping for breath. Taking this chance, Yoshiki and Kyouji speed off before Gore can retaliate.

Yoshiki: This is that monster's world.

Kyouji, however, can only think of what Gore said about Aoi: "she is here". He looks down at the hand mirror in his lap--the only thing Aoi had left behind after her disappearance in the mansion. Yoshiki parks, and they end up sleeping in the car until morning. They buy food at a convenience store, where the shop owner talks in the same distorted, broken voice as all the others who are under the influence of this dimension.

Kyouji calls his aunt, Yoshiki telling him they need to get the pendant that was left in his house back--when Gore's face appears on the screen. He laughs shortly, and the phone dies.

They continue driving, but Yoshiki is distracted and loses control of the car. The cause? Gore, of course, but before they can do anything, he's disappeared--and the impact of the crash was fatal for Yoshiki.

The next day, Kyouji is faced by Aoi once again, who is rendered mute as she stands uneasily in the front hall of Yuka's mansion. And just like last time, this turned out to be a dream.

Kyouji wanders alone into the forest, to the remains of Yuka's house--only now, the car that Yoshiki was killed in is upright in the earth, untouched since the crash. Yuka then appears before him, completely fine, with Gore behind her.

Yuka: So, Kyouji, why did you come here? Besides coming to visit me, of course.
Kyouji: To get Aoi out.
Yuka: Stupid Kyouji. You still care about that girl? Please forget her already.
Kyouji: Shut up! I'm going to get Aoi out!

Yuka suddenly curses, Gore screams--and the next thing Kyouji knows, Aoi is standing there.

Aoi: I'm sorry.
Aoi: I won't--run away anymore.

But Yuka cuts this touching reunion short, looking furious. As very earth shakes, and as Kyouji and Aoi take cover--Yuka's mansion is back, looking exactly the same pre-burning--save the grim reminder of the crashed car, which remains rooted in the floorboards.

Aoi and Kyouji run through the house, looking to escape--but the walls suddenly give way to the red sky and countless eyes, with Yuka and Gore blocking the way.

Yuka: Damnit! No more, I'm done. Gore, eat that girl. I thought she would spend eternity inside the mirror, but somehow she escaped... I'm not happy at all.
Gore: But Yuka, weren't we going to wait for these two? That's right, I don't understand, weren't you going to wait?
Yuka: i'm not going to lose to her! Gore, don't you listen to everything I say?!
Gore: ...
Yuka: Go! Eat that girl right now!
Gore: Gore will do whatever Yuka orders! That's right, Gore's work is Yuka's fun!

Gore targets Aoi, merely injuring her at first, before Yuka orders him to end it. Kyouji closes his eyes, fearing the worst--instead, both Yuka and Gore are gone when he opens them, and Aoi is still alive. Kyouji and Aoi go after Gore, but Yuka's agonized scream suddenly rings out.

Yuka: Stop it--! Noooooooo!
Yuka: Gore, Gore! Don't! Yuka doesn't want to be alone!
Yuka: Kyouji, you're horrible--Gore is the only one Yuka has--Gore is the only one--

Yuka's begging is brutally averted when Aoi cracks the surface in the wall--revealing it to have been part of the mirror--in fact, this whole world has been inside the mirror. Looking shocked at herself, as if she didn't have control over her own actions, Aoi takes a shard and stabs Yuka with it. Kyouji joins in, and too is apologetic for having to murder Yuka in such an ugly way.

Aoi: Ah...a-ah, ah...ah...
Kyouji: i'm sorry. I'm sorry, but...this girl is too cruel. She killed Yoshiki, and tried to kill Aoi too.

They break through--and the pieces give way to the forest. Kyouji looks back, to see Yuka's mansion in ruins, Yoshiki's car still there. Later, when they return to the forest, even the ruins of Yuka's house are gone.

Aoi: ...We killed her, didn't we?

Aoi still feels even a small amount guilt for Yuka's death--to refer again to the Aeka Syndrome, here is where the two girls are different indeed. Aeka eventually lashed out directly against her bullies, was horrified at the thought of hurting those she loved, to the point that she would remove herself if she thought she was a danger, and felt no remorse when taking vengance. Aoi didn't fight against Yuka at all, and a great deal of her bitterness was not directed at Yuka, but at Akane, who had not deliberately done anything malicious towards her. And when she does have to put an end to things, Aoi experiences a little bit of a loss of her humanity, even if it's hurting someone who has hurt her.

Both Kouji and Aoi return to school, and later, Aoi confides in Kyouji that at last, she's let go of her hatred.

Aoi: Between Akane-chan and Jinno-kun, I can face anything that's difficult. Now, I'm going to talk with Akane-chan more. We'll talk about the hard things, the silly things, lots of things. That's why, I'm sorry about before...Akane-chan has a very earnest heart.
Aoi: Jinno-kun, you, too...you're such a good person.

This time, instead of fear and a tremble in her voice, Aoi says it with a smile. Now that's she's gained confidence to no longer shy away from anyone's good intentions--like accepting Akane's good will for what it is, not purely pity--Aoi can reciprocate in their relationship.

Aoi's story ends with her and Kyouji sitting in his room, learning how to hold hands for the first time.

The epilogue shows an ordinary day at school, where Akane and Aoi are arguing--it's clearly not a bitter and hateful argument, but a casual one. Aoi can now freely speak her mind with Akane, and have an actual friendship with her, without fear of some ulterior emotion behind it.

END AOI ROUTE

Gore Screaming Show: First Impressions: Akane Route

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 01:29:12 GMT

This was written while playing through the three routes of the three "typical" heroines, and is more an in-depth summary of each route with my own interjections here and there. The bad ends, Yamiko, and Yuka's routes are not included. Roughly totals to 11k, along with accompanying CGs. In general, my translations probably have more than a few errors given I've only been studying Japanese for three years, so take all translated dialogue with a tablespoon of salt.

Since the post is too large, I'll be splitting this per each heroine's route.

The tale begins with Jinno Kyouji riding his bike to school, returning to his hometown after years of absence. His parents are overseas, so he's being taken care of by his aunt, Yamiko. As he's riding however, he hears a voice, saying "Welcome home..." and seeing a young girl smiling. However, he then loses control of his bike and crashes, and both the girl and the voice are gone.

Kyouji then goes to school, where he meets Akane, Aoi, and Kiika. He, with his aunt and Akane, visit the old well in the middle of the forest, to help his aunt with her research for the occult magazine she writes for. At the well, he meets a little girl--the same girl he had seen before. She is sweet and polite to Kyouji, while venemous to Akane and any other girl who's with Kyouji, depending on whose path you picked.

"My name is Yuka. Remember it."

Yuka vanishes, leaving Kyouji and his chosen girl with nothing but confusion--signalling the hell to come.

Later, Kyouji and his classmates go to investigate the old house in the forest, where they meet an old woman who is missing an eye, claiming to be Yuka's mother.

Yuka's mother literally begs Kyouji and classmates to come inside to visit her daughter, who is too ill to go to school, and thus doesn't have any friends. And, surprise, suprise, the daughter is--Yuka! Yuka nearly breaks down sobbing when Kyouji acts cold towards her, apologizing and begging for forgiveness, awhile his friends keep egging him on to forgive her, because no one wants to make the little girl cry. Once Kyouji does, however, Yuka is all smiles.

Yuka: Mother, where's the tea?
Yuka's mother: ...Eh?
Yuka: Uh-oh; mother, it's always polite to bring the tea without asking. Did you already forget?
Yuka's mother: A-Ah. T-that's right! I'm very sorry, I'll go make it now!

Then, when they are all ready to leave, Yuka's mother gets this look of utter terror on her face, and abruptly goes back into the house--just as Yuka comes prancing up to Kyouji. It seems that Yuka's mother was terrified--of Yuka.

START AKANE ROUTE

Later, Kyouji and Akane look for Yuka, thinking she might've fallen into the open well. When they find her Yuka introduces them to her friend, Gore Screaming Show, and makes no haste to terrify Akane and mock her relentlessly.

While Kyouji is trying to comfort a distraught Akane, Yuka has vanished. The two look up at the sound of sudden laughter from above--Yuka is giggling, ignoring their cries for help as she closes the top of the well, trapping them inside.

While trying to escape, Kyouji and Akane closer examine the well walls, and discover there's a chilling message scratched into the surface, over and over and over.

"Hate, hate, hate, hate, hate. I don't want to die, I don't want to die. I'll kill them. Die! Die! Die! Die! I'll kill them, idiots! Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! Die!"

Disturbed but still determined, the pair discovers a hole in the stone surface, and venture inside it to a hollowed-out area, which holds a few chopped logs, a blanket, and a door with gaps of light pouring through, even though it's rusted shut. Using the logs to break through the storeroom's door, they call for help. Akane and Kyouji are discovered, and driven to the hospital.

Later that night, Kyouji falls asleep--and dreams of himself and Akane were they were children. Both of them are being held down by bullies while they pull off Akane's skirt and underwear, and yank down Kyouji's own pants, taking sadistic pleasure in forcing him to masturbate in front of Akane.

The dream then shifts to the well he had just been trapped in hours before, where Akane is pleading for help while Gore (presumably) tortures her and Yuka amusedly watches.

Kyouji wakes up the following day, and Akane isn't there to greet him at the door. Nor does she come to school on time, but when she does finally show, she's acting just as cheerful as ever. Kyouji, however, is still unsettled as he remembers his previous dream.

It begins pouring in the evening, and Kyou peers outside to see none other than the man who saved him, Yoshiki, talking to Yuka, both of them ignoring the downpour pounding down on them.

Yoshiki: Come out, you monster!

Yuka grins, and Gore's mad, shrill voice screeches through the monotone splatter of rain,

Gore: YA----HOO! It's been a while! It's been a while!

Yoshiki, enraged, manages to catch Gore off-guard before shooting him/it, but Gore has the power of a monster and thus, easily sends Yoshiki to his knees.

Yuka: Listen up, I don't care about this. Right now, I'm going to find Hi-kun. I don't care about Sayumi. Besides, Sayumi is already dead. Enough is enough.
Yoshiki: 'Enough...is enough'?!
Yuka: You never know when to quit. Do you want to die? It'd be easy to kill another, so forget about it already.
Yoshiki: You...I'm going to kill you! This is for Sayumi!
Yuka: Really, now. Do you really want to die?
Yoshiki: I'm going to kill you.
Yuka: No use~ I can't die yet. How about, if I kill Hi-kun, then kill you, is that good?
Yuka: Hahahaha! Look at you, you look so funny! Your face is weird! Hahaha, hey, Gore, you can go ahead and kill him now! Eat his head if you want!
Gore: I don't wanna! Men taste bland! Bland!

Yoshiki flees, running into Akane and Kyouji, who are walking home together. Yoshiki orders them to run away, but Yuka merely watches them, and then quietly retreats without any major bloodshed.

The next day, Akane comes bursting through the doors, rushing at Kyouji.

Kyouji: Akane, are you okay?
Akane: Kyouji...
Kyouji: What's the matter?
Akane: That girl...that girl came here...
Akane: Why is Yuka-chan and that monster at school?!
Kyouji: No--that can't be--

Kyouji runs off to confirm it for himself, and lo, the nightmare has come true. Gore is spouting nonsense, while Yuka is beside him, laughing. After a brief one-sided talk, as Kyouji orders them to go back several times, Yuka relents and once again disappears tracelessly--but not before a parting grin from Gore.

The next day, Akane tells Kyouji that she's leaving school. Whenever she goes, Yuka will follow, and this way, less people will be in danger.

Kyouji: If two people go, she'll find us easier.
Akane: Then we don't have to go together. I'll go alone.
Kyouji: Yuka will come afer you. Where do you plan on going then?
Akane: Sh-shut up, I'm not scared. I know a little about how to take care of myself, thank you very much. I'm not joking. I'm really going!

The next day, Kyouji skips school, instead venturing into the forest to find Yuka's house. However, once inside, he's confronted by Yuka. He discovers Akane had followed him in, and both of them are caught. And behind Akane--Gore appears. Yuka "invites" them inside her room, and speaks cheerfully.

Kyouji: Where is he? (referring to Yoshiki, who has been missing since his confrontation with Yuka)
Yuka: Where do you think?
Akane: Please, he's been really patient, and we'd really appreciate it if you'd tell us--
Yuka: (abruptly stops smiling) Shut up. Just keep your mouth shut.

A timid knocking at the door interrupts, and in comes Yuka's mother, uneasily shrinking away from Gore.

Yuka: You're so slow! You're not supposed to make us wait!
Yuka's Mother: ...Uuu...
Yuka: Momone, please begin.
Momone (Yuka's mother): N...no...
Yuka: Please start already! You made our guests wait, after all.
Momone: N...no! No! Please, I'm begging you, don't make me!
Yuka: I said to start already! ...Here, look what I cooked for you!

We don't get to see what it is exactly, but Momone's horrific screams tells us enough as she's forced to pick up the spoon. No sooner than when it clatters to the table does she make a choked croaking noise, apologizing frantically. Yuka ignores this, to show off a necklace to Kyouji.

Yuka: Isn't this a pretty pendant? But, it doesn't fit Gore or me...
Akane: (slaps Yuka across the face) How cruel... How cruel! How cruel! What are you doing?! What about your mother?! I will never understand this child! Never, ever will I understand her!

Yuka smiles, and Gore's triumphant screams rings out as he appears behind Akane. Kyouji grabs Akane, and they start running as fast they can out of Yuka's house. Opening a door, it leads to not another room, but a red-hazed, alternate version of the hallway. For every door they open, disembodied eyes stare out at them, as the seemingly solid doors disappear. Akane receives a phone call from her mother, and she hurries to answer her cell, begging for help--when the voice cuts off and a maniacal tune plays, Gore's face appearing out from the screen.

Gore: (mockingly) Oh help, it's so dangerous! It's dangerous, it's dangerous, isn't it! Hurry up and save me! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Yuka: It's~use~less, Kyouji. You haven't left here!
Yuka: Kill her! Kill that woman, now!

Kyouji gets separated from Akane while the house continues to constantly shift between the red dimension and the ordinary house. He manages to find his way to Yuka's room--where he finds a wounded Yoshiki. Momone is begging him to flee, but Yoshiki instead calmly smokes a cigarette.

Momone: Please, let's hurry up and leave! We can go right now! Didn't you come here to save me?!
Yoshiki: Sorry, but I'm not going anywhere. I didn't come here to save you.

Kyouji tries to get Yoshiki to tell him what's going on, but he refuses. Urged by Yoshiki, Kyouji leaves him to look for Akane, with Momone following.

Momone: Yuka!! Yuka, you demon! I'm not listening to what you say, not now! Yes, being cruel is the only thing you can do! Ah, it's too bad, ahahaha, but you can't do anything! I have the pendant! Now, watch, you and your precious Kyouji, how much I hate you!

Yuka watches, impassive. Momone reaches out, trying to stab Yuka--but a piece of falling glass kills her, the knife still buried in Yuka's stomach.

Yuka: You...you stupid child...W...what are you...doing...?
Yuka: Kyouji...Kyouji, you...hate her, don't you...? You hate Momone, don't you? I...Kyouji...I've always been with you... Once that girl's gone...you'll always be with me...won't you...?

Cut to Yoshiki, still alone and smoking, when Akane stumbles up to him--her eyes blank, posture slumped. Gore materializes behind her, but she doesn't show a hint of emotion. Gore just as quickly vanishes, taking this new doll-like Akane with him. Yoshiki apologizes to Kyouji, and the next shot is Yuka's house in flames.

Kyouji, somehow have gotten out fast enough to avoid the blaze, is screaming out Akane's name, holding her in his arms.

Kyouji: Akane!
Akane: ...
Kyouji: Akane! Hang in there!
Kyouji: ...A-Akane...? Please, say something!
Akane: Mn...
Kyouji: Thank god...really, thank goodness...

Clouds part to expose a beautiful starry sky, as the flames crackle before their eyes. Peace, at last.

Yeah, right. Pfft. This is Gore Screaming Show.

The rest of the evening is spent in a soothing lull...but something seems a bit odd.

Kyouji: Hey, Akane?
Akane: Nn...
Kyouji: Akane! H...hey? Say something!
Akane: (the blank expression fades as she smiles) ...Kyouji.
Kyouji: I'm so relieved...are you really okay?
Akane: I'm fine; I'll see you later...Kyouji.

By morning, everything is back to mundane school life. Akane seems to suddenly like wearing her hair down, and acts oddly coy around Kyouji, but surely those are just the signs of a young, budding love, right?

Akane: (giggles) I'm so happy. I've always wanted to visit Kyouji...I've always wanted to meet Kyouji.

But Akane goes to Kyouji's house everyday--could the trauma of yesterday have caused a slight memory lapse? A chill suddenly sweeps over the room--and despite the two never even having kissed, Akane acts like a total nymphomanic, a complete opposite to the independant girl she was before.

For a love interest in an eroge, Akane up until this point has been actually quite an admirable character. Not to say I envy her situation--but she definitely is someone with depth, and not one of the billion cardboard cutouts that only serve as a walking sextoy.

Think about it. She's an average schoolgirl returning home, hoping to reacquaint herself with the everyday humdrum life, when she meets a friend she hasn't seen in years. She even tries to be friendly with the class bully, and even harbors feelings for him to a point--until said bully crushes them under his shoe, revealing he had only been playing with her all along. Akane ends up falling in love with her reunited friend, as most romances go--only to have the sugary-sweet realization be butchered and hacked mercilessly at every chance by a mysterious little girl who she tries to be nice to--she's sick and doesn't have any friends, after all, even if she is a bit rude--but that little girl turns out to control a vicious and hideous monster, traps them in a well to die, and enjoys tormenting her also by trying to gain the affections of a boy Akane herself already loves. Yuka shifts reality itself, and haunts her wherever she goes for simply associating with Kyouji. But does Akane buckle back and depend on Kyouji to keep her safe? No, she decides to leave school, because it would put less people in danger. Willing to take on unfathomable terror and emotional, mental, and physical agony at the hands of a vulgar monstrosity, all on her own. To protect the ones she loves.

The next day, Akane shows up at Kyouji's door like usual--but with her hair tangled like she just rolled out of bed, her tie slung acround her neck, the shirt unbuttoned to show a good deal of breast--and obviously going without a bra. Even Kyouji's flirtatious aunt notices.

Yamiko: Akane-chan, are you sure you want to go to school like that? It's sexy, but...it's not reasonable...
Akane: Shut up.

Akane is acting like a petulant child, willing to do anything to steal Kyouji's attention. Does this sound like someone else? It should.

Later, Kyouji and Akane visit the burned remains of Yuka's house--and once again, reality shifts, and he finds himself inside Yuka's room--or else a very convincing illusion of it. Yuka is immensely amused with Akane's new sexbomb appearance--but before he can linger, Kyouji is led out of the forest, and back to school--as if nothing had happened.

Meanwhile, the Principal had been introducing a new student to their school--Yuka. Along with a new teacher--none other than Gore Screaming Show. Clearly, the real world has been so distorted that a creature such as Gore can now be perfectly acceptable. Gore then proceeds to murder the Principal in front of the class, while none of the students bat an eye as he feeds, and Yuka is simply gleeful.

This new, twisted world dissolves into endless chaos--Yamiko has begun to adopt the new Akane's sexual vulgarity. An absurd menage a trois occurs in the tub, between Yamiko, Akane, and Kyouji, when static floods the screen, and Yamiko disappears--abruptly replaced by Yuka without explanation. But then again, no explanation is needed. Yuka controls this insane dimension, after all.

Both girls stare up at him with the same lustful, mischievous look, and they say, one after another:

Yuka: You're so strange, Onii-chan!
Akane: You're so strange, Onii-chan!

Yuka has been posessing Akane, just as she's manipulated everyone else in this universe, where her obsession with Kyouji is the only thing that matters.

Kyouji: These two...
Yuka and Akane: Of course. That's because, Yuka is Akane's little sister.

Kyouji, as the days go by, misses the old Akane, the one with fire and passion and flaws, who didn't just try to screw anything that moved.

Kyouji: You're not Akane, you do know that...?

Yuka forces herself on Yoshiki, knowing it would humiliate him while Kyouji is forced to watch, with Yuka driving home the shame with jabs like "Am I as good as Saiyumi, old man?", "Am I as good as your dead wife?".

One day, Kyouji remembers the pendant mentioned before Yuka's house was burned down, grabbing it. Yuka gasps, struggling for breath, her triumph turning into utter panic.

Yuka: Kyouji! K-kyouji! Kyouji! Please don't do that! What are you doing?! Do you want me to die?!

However, Kyouji is stopped when he's abruptly back in his room, and Gore is there--apparently gone even more insane as he spews babble that is so incoherent that it isn't even words anymore, like a broken machine. Yielding no answers, Gore disappears, and Akane enters.

Kyouji: Yes, that's right. You're not Akane.
Akane: ...
Kyouji: Isn't that right? You're not Akane.
Akane: ...
Kyouji: You bitch, Yuka! Why did you do this to her?!
Yuka (in Akane's body): So did it, so you would notice me. Yuka is so happy...you always recognize her.
Kyouji: Where's Akane? Answer me! Where is Akane?
Yuka: Who cares about her, when you like Yuka now?
Kyouji: Where the fuck is she?!
Yuka: Why...? Yuka likes Kyouji the best! Yuka is the only one who really knows Kyouji!
Kyouji: I don't care about that. Tell me about Akane!
Yuka: No! Kyouji likes Akane, so he'll bring her back! Why do you hate me?!
Yuka: I'm not Akane!! Even after you have sex with me, you still don't feel good!
Kyouji: That's because I thought you were Akane! I love Akane! I don't know how you got inside, but you're getting out of her!
Yuka: Then...you'll have to kill me.
Yuka: Because once I entered this body, Kyouji loved me...but, I'm still not her. So, will you really kill me? ...I wonder, if you kill this body, if this girl will die too? I can share this body, doing everything with her. Or you can kill Akane, and I'll always be with you--which one?

Kyouji decides to kill Yuka--and Yuka, crushed, leaves Akane's body before this can happen, while Gore echoes her own question back at her: "What will you do? What will you do?"

Yuka: (on the verge of tears) Kyouji said...I am nothing to him. I'm not here to Kyouji, and I'm not alive in this world, either.

From Kyouji's room, the world changes to an expanse of endless red soil, red sky, and disembodied eyes staring blindly. Akane is beginning to regain conciousness, and she and Kyouji escape together.

Gore: Yuka...is this really alright? Is this really alright?
Yuka: No more; I'm not alive anymore. I am--

The world collapses around them--and then, they see nothing but an ordinary blue sky. Akane is back to herself, and where Yuka's house, or the remnants used to be--there is nothing, as if it never existed. They go back to Kyouji's house, and consummate their relationship for the first time.

Kyouji and Akane are back at their usual schoolday, life has returned to normal, and once again the night sky is seen, undisturbed.

The epilogue shows Kyouji working at a restaurant, where Akane visits him, and the two chat for a while. The final shot is of a clear, blue sky, both of our protagonists having found peace.

END AKANE ROUTE

Death Note fic: Talking Over Tea, A/Inner, R

Sun, 06 Dec 2009 23:55:58 GMT

Title: Talking Over Tea
Fandom: Death Note (The Alphabet-verse)
Rated: R
Pair: A/Inner, Ana/Inner, Inner/O
Word count: 4,017
Summary: Captured gypsy Ines struggles to stay alive in a concentration camp, despite the murder of her people and the deepest betrayal of her trust. Historical AU.
Warnings: Graphic violence, forced starvation, rape, THE FUCKING HOLOCAUST
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note nor The Alphabet RP. Inner and Ana belong to fliegenmaus, while this version of A belongs to hervictory. O is mine.
Notes: HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY SARAH!

Auburn skin, dark hair, darker eyes; some with strange beads of vermilion powder pressed into their brow, some with gold bangles jangling loosely on their arms, some with their hair wrapped tightly, hidden away by bright, colored cloth, the smell of spices and blazing golden summers hanging around them almost tangible, so musty and thick was their odor, their languages musical and velvet sound. Thin silver coins tinkled at their ankles, fiddle-instruments dangling from slack brown fingers. Skin was as wrinkled as old crumpled paper on the elderly, smooth as cream on the young ones, the men with squarish jaws and firm lines of the face, the women with their layers of skirts, amulets tied around exposed hollow of the throat and long curls of hair twisted into braids, the children drooping in their garments and plump faced.

Mothers held their infant nestled in one arm, the other full of tattered bundles of cloth, bursting with clothes and utensils and tent canvases. Everyone had their own suitcase or package to carry, filled with intimate trinkets of a dust-swept life, their stomachs full of bread and hidden jewelry.

"Red!" One whispered fervently into her hands. "Red, red, red! It will swallow me! We need more black, blue!"

"There will be plenty of black and blue," One woman with graying hair muttered thickly, "If you do not watch your mouth while they are watching."

There was no more talk as the mass was split, herded and forced to follow the signs that read: Men and boys to the left, women and girls to the right.

The rest of the night was spent in humiliation, as hair was cut and clothes were stolen, and at least half of those that had been with them upon departing from the cattle train had vanished, the air thick with smoke in their stead.

All who remained wore the issued black triangle patches pinned to their thin uniforms, the lantern glow in their eyes extinguished, as if a freezing winter wind had snuffed it out. During the waning hours of night, when sleep was permitted, the cramped, wooden bunks were silent of bells and tinkling baubles, everything except for muffled sobs and the soft chant of colors someone recited in the dark, as if in prayer.

And like this, there was no other movement until the crunch of boots and the blast of gunshots woke the gypsies, accompanied by vicious slurs in German. As would be their alarm for months to come.

* * *

Ines hastily rubbed the dust of slumber from her eyes and reached a hand back, fingering the short tufts of dark hair that used to curl down to her wrists as she lowered herself from the top bunk, wrinkling her nose at the stench of sweat and urine. A shovel was thrust at her; she gripped it tightly and followed her people outside, her knees momentarily weak from the weight of the tool and the pain of the flat blade cutting into her fingers, making the handle grow slick with blood.

They were led into the forest, and were forced to dig deep holes. As Ines tried to focus enough effort into lifting the shovel and pushing away the soil, the green surrounded her on all sides, seeming as if it was going to crush her. Panic blazed through her, and she had to bite her lip hard enough to puncture the skin in order to refrain from stopping: she knew, if she so much as relaxed her grip for even a moment, she would be joining the steadily-growing pile in the graves they had dug themselves.

She glanced up at the sky, desperate for a scrap of blue, but all that could be seen was thick smoke, choked by foreign odors. In a place of red and white, there would be nothing merciful here.

Throughout the procession of the day, she at last unwrapped her sore hands from the shovel, standing in line with her tin cup for thin, watery soup that had long gone cold, and bitterest coffee. Wincing at the taste, Ines barely had time to swallow before it was back to the horrifying labor.

Days had blurred into weeks had blurred into months, and she was steadily growing feebler: she would die staring into twin barrels of a rifle at this rate. Was she going to languish in white and be molested by yellow forever...?

By the time she began to trudge back with living skeletons, her wounds stinging fiercely, Ines had decided to attempt escape. Her hazel eyes blazed as she watched the sky quickly being swallowed by the black of night.

Anything had to be better than the life slowly dwindling from her bones, starvation, and bright crimson.

"der Abschaum der menschlichen Gesellschaft! I ought to shoot you all right where you stand!" Screamed the rough voice of their overseer, brandishing his gun menacingly as a warning to them to hurry to their bunks.

However, as broken and weakened shuffled past her, Ines slowly slipped between them, trying her best to blend into the crowd. She could see the iron gates, the spiked barbed wire, the men standing at their posts; she knew, that between the time that lights went out and day broke, the guards were switched. Between those occurrences, opportunity was golden.

Taking short, shallow breaths, white puffs of air escaped from her in a thin vapor as she clung to the side of the bunk, ducking her head. Now she just had to wait, and hope that no one would notice her missing, instead assuming she had been murdered in the forest.

The crunch of boots caused her joints to stiffen, her eyes shuttering wide. Already--? She hadn't been out there for more than an hour, at most. Her fingers were laced into knots, her throat dry as black, leather boots appeared around the corner.

If you're going to kill me, at least show me your green! Admit to how it is! Don't act as if you don't have innocent blood on your hands; red, red, red, there is so much red in this place!

But before she could say anything, an arm shot out from the darkness, a hand clamped tightly around her jaw, filthy fingers tucking inside her mouth to prevent her from making a sound.

Then the other hand grabbed her by her short hair, yanking at the roots until tears welled; she could only utter a choked noise. A piece of worn cloth was roughly tied around her eyes, and she was dragged forward, her bare feet scraping over dirt and sometimes being trampled on by those boots.

What was this? An execution? But an officer would've shot her on the spot, not gone through the trouble to gag and blindfold her.

Unless--unless they were after not her life, but her flesh. Ines paled, trying to spit out the fingers, to bite down, anything. But it was no use; she was led along like a puppet, until her weary and bleeding feet at stop fumbling over themselves, and she was sat down on something, the chemical stink of chloroform making her feel ill.

Was she going to be experimented on? She had heard about that doctor, Mengele, that viciously yellow man who sewed twins together and cut off limbs--a shiver tore through her; when at last the fingers were removed from her mouth, the hand holding onto her skull gone, though the blindfold remained.

"White!" The word burst from her in a cry. "So much white! It is everywhere, strangling me, like veil obscuring things; rip it off! Let me see my own death!"

"What's wrong with this one?" Came the voice of a man, disapproving.

"The sickness is more in the mind, than the body." Came a young, feminine voice, right beside her. She shrunk away when a soft hand laid on her shoulder, though at the same time, yearned for that small warmth.

"Do not fear getting killed by me; I'm a Kapo, I'm appointed to look after other prisoners, Jew or not. You are sick, and if you give me your bread rations for a week, I can convince Herr Doktor here to look after you."

"If you are a Kapo as you claim, then you wouldn't have a need for extra bread. You're so green!" Ines replied, reaching up to take off her blindfold, before a hand gripped both of hers tightly in the darkness.

"Take your time to think my offer over. But if you were sick, you could be forbidden to work--there would be ways to secure you proper papers in the meantime. There would be ways to smuggle you out, claims of wanting to quarantine you." The voice crooned, hot breath ghosting along the shell of her ear. "I want to help you, but I cannot let you see my face. If you were to tell, it would mean death for me as well."

"A name, then! A name for my green friend, can you at least tell me that without having to give up any food?"

"My name is Ana. Let us indeed be friends, gypsy. I shall visit you again two nights from now."

Once she was taken back, Ines was forced to close her eyes before she was unblinded. The girl escaped too fast for her to see, and she had to hurry to scramble into her bunk before the angry night patrol came.

Her stomach woefully empty, she dreamt of faceless girls in green dresses.

* * *

The two days came and went until the moon rose huge and white in the sky, but even that was covered with ashes and smoke.

"Look, look! I have snuck almost a full cup of milk for you, nice and warm, it will help you sleep! Now, do you trust me? Will you let me help my friend?"

Ines felt it was useless telling her to look when her eyes were covered, but reached out and felt the tin cup, dipped her fingers into the moisture and suckled at her fingers, indeed tasting sweet milk.

"Why would you do this?" She asked. "Why act so blue in this hell of white and red, yellow and green?"

"Because I want to see you live. On the outside, I want someone to talk to and grow up with; it's horrible being alone!" Ana cried, her tone spiking, upset. "My parents have been separated from me; I don't simply want to survive, I want to live! I want to be a normal girl with friend with whom I can talk amiably over tea and books!"

"...Cerulean..."

"Stop your silly babble! Will you trust me, or not! Please," Her voice lowered, "Tell them you're sick, and find your freedom. I will follow you."

Small, spidery fingers landed on the back of her neck, digging into the brown skin, nudging her head forward. It was a chaste, dry brushing of lips, but it was enough to jolt Ines to dip down and repeat the action, tenderly tasting that softness once again.

"One night," Came Ana's voice, quiet and breathless. "I'll give you one more night to decide. There isn't much time."

* * *

And so came the following evening, the sky painted faint lilac and stinking of burning human flesh.

Her pockets stuffed full with stale bread, Ines was once again led to the abandoned infirmary.

"Blue," She babbled excitedly as hands rummaged through her pockets, emptying out all the bread she had saved, little by little. "It's a blue world, oh, and now everything will be pink!"

"Yes, pink," Murmured Ana. "I'm so grateful to you. I don't even know your name."

"Ines!" She cried. "It's Ines, Ana, and look, both our names start with vowels!"

"Shh," A finger was pressed to her lips. "We'll be heard if you're too loud. I understand you're excited, but we don't want anyone to come looking for us."

Hands scuttled to the back of her skull, fiddling with the knot of her blindfold. "Let me show you something."

The cloth was removed, and Ines opened her eyes to darkness, barely able to see the faint outline of ghostly-white figure, pressing warmly against her hip.

"Your eyes will adjust, just wait."

As said, slowly Ines could see the finer details: the delicate curve of the jaw, the wide, dark eyes, the long sienna hair. Pale cheeks, flushed with joy, small hands still clutching her payment.

"You too, are such a pink girl! Pink and brown, how well they go together." She breathed, smelling strong, sweetish perfume on Ana.

"My dearest friend, Ines, now we'll have freedom."

The colors melded together, immersing them both into blissful black as white fingers slid beneath her filthy rags, sharing another kiss, butterfly-light, pink as roses.

When Ines was awakened in her bunk, the sun had not yet risen. Ana was not with her, despite that they had snuck back together, hand in hand.

The ruthless iron muzzle of a gun bashed into the crown of her head, causing her to cry out and slap her trembling brown fingers over the blood leaking down her forehead, her skull feeling split apart. She was told, in a sharp and bitter tongue, not to even dare think about freedom again. She was told that the Kapo had confessed all about the rebellious young gypsy who was planning escape, even giving her bread to keep her quiet.

She was told that she was being taken to Standartenführer.

* * *

He had short, golden hair growing in uneven tufts, hazel eyes framed by scarlet, and powder-white skin. His uniform was black and cloaked his thin frame, but the silver of the revolver tucked into his belt loop, and the awful red of his Swastika armband, flared out as his true colors. Like serpents, they hissed and bound her trembling arms at her sides, her hands slowly curling into numb, clammy fists. He merely laid back in a leather chair, his fingers laced together over his lap, inspecting her as if she was a piece of cattle to be selected for his supper.

"Untermensch, all of you gypsies and Jews and cripples." He appeared to be muttering to himself, but the dark gaze focus on her face told her otherwise. "Lebensunwertes Leben. How disgusting."

One gloved hand reached out and squeezed her jaw, yanking her forward onto his desk as his fingers bruised the side of her face. His belt buckle pressed tightly into her stomach, and she could smell the yolk of eggs and the foul bitterness of coffee on his breath, but she was unable to turn away, she was unable to stop shuddering.

He released her shoved her back without warning, letting her crumple to the floor before she could find steady footing. Her skull still throbbing in agony, Ines managed to take hold of his desk and force herself to stand. The yellow, the yellow was coiling all around her!

"Make yourself useful before I shoot you." The scarlet menace said. "How about cleaning off the mud you tracked all over my boots."

Ines saw dark splotches of dried dirt that indeed matched the amount of filth caked on her feet. She was given no cleaning cloth however, instead being told to clean it with her own rags. Struggling to swallow the cries of green that bubbled in her throat, she dropped to her thin knees, holding out her soiled hem to wipe the black leather. The barrel of the gun nudged against her temple, her joints stiff as if a doll yet to be unwound, tangled up her strings.

"Red!" Ines hissed. "So, so viciously crimson!"

"Get started, die Schlampe."

She took the fabric in hand, trying to wipe away as much filth as possible, but only succeeding in smearing it around. The more effort she put into trying to pick it up, the more the dried mud began to flake off, sprinkling dirt onto the carpet. With no wax or polish, the stained material had little effect, and Ines found her mind slipping between green and yellow, yearning for pink.

Ana, was this her freedom? She had just wanted to swindle her out of her food, that was all? Vicious orange frothed as she recalled the night-dampened memory of soft fingers and earnest whispers. Promises of freedom and friendship, and chatting over novels while snacking on scones and hot piping jasmine tea in china teapots, all ripped to shreds as she was left starving and beaten.

The sweet perfume, the long hair, she could've seen--of course, they were gifts, bribes--no ordinary Kapo would be permitted those things. And it now it was far too late, her glass-heart shattered. Dark purple flared, congealing around the stained, infected white, soaking through her skin.

The warning grip of rough fingers wrapped around her wrist, ready to snap brittle bone as her hand faltered. The Standartenführer pressed against her, the metal of his belt buckle digging between her shoulders as long fingers strung through sections of dark hair, his thigh brushing against her smashed auburn cheek.

Oh, Ana, the green! The green was everywhere!

A heavy hand laid on the back of her neck, feeling the gooseflesh crop up, the way her shoulders tensed. It slid down to touch the black triangle pinned to her front, her mark of shame, her brilliant scarlet brand.

"I was told, you know, to do whatever it takes until you repent. You're lucky I haven't shot you on the spot, and only because you're free labor. I'll carve out your eyes unless you start looking at what you're supposed to be cleaning, gypsy."

Her hands returned to the boot, fiercely beginning to rub it down again; though it made no difference, she was sure.

"That Judenrat who turned you over, you should thankful to her."

Ines raised her hazel eyes, finding the man's gaze was instead fixed outside the glass plane, towards the black, thick sky.

"She will be warming you tonight, as firewood, that is."

Ines' hands dropped, to be grabbed and wrenched, tearing tendons and withered muscles--

Crack!

The dirtied boot jerked up and smashed into the side of her face with a sickeningly pulpy crunch, Ines crumpling as copper gushed from torn tissue and flooded her mouth as she tried to spit out broken chips of yellowed teeth before she swallowed them, her swollen cheek feeling torn open.

The red! She could taste it, she could hear the giggling cruelly, softly at the periphery of her vision, mingling with salt and blood and pus as she nursed her twitching broken hand, lying fetal-like on her stomach, her legs twisted away from her. The crimson, the scarlet, it was caging her, all around her! How she would pray for even a hint of blue as she lay, shivering in agony, groaning, waiting for the soothing black of oblivion!

Her eyes weakly managed to unclench long enough to see the Standartenführer lean over, surveying the puddle of dark blood like a vaguely unsatisfying movie.

"Come back tomorrow, I have more work for you. Get yourself off my floor before you contaminate it."

Ines scrambled to hoist herself up, a sharp cry of pain escaping as her head spun from that movement alone. Somehow, with the persuasion of bullets firing in the wall beside her, she managed to stumble out and begin the long arduous path back to her bunk. She was chilled at the sight of those hollow suns hiding such yellow eyes.

As she tried to shuffle one foot in front of the other, her hand dangling useless and her face swollen and crusted with blood, Ines could taste the remains of Ana in the air.

* * *

deflorieren.

Such an awful word.

It implied there was a 'flower' to deprive, destroy in the first place, as if she wasn't steadily turning into nothing but a skeleton with brown skin stretched tightly over bones, as if hurt when she writhed to get away, large hands pressed up and molded against the sharp angle of her hipbones, as if her empty stomach didn't cramp up in pain and leave her nauseated and ghostlike, as if she were well-fed, and comfortable, and her first time was silk and roses instead of agony, the smell of gunpowder and her dead lover pressed up against his blond hair, and hard fingers pinching her cheeks to make them appear rosy and healthy, sliding across the crevices of her body, savoring the taste of despair and sweat on his tongue, as if she had not already been violated, raped by memories, by colors, the stiff serpent of flesh that burned her insides with white venom, as if everything were something romantic, as if this were out of love.

As if she didn't grudgingly accept the little cup of milk or scrap of roast like a bitter, bitter medicine as she lied there naked and injured on the floor, if only to survive the red just for one more day.

As if she didn't know she didn't know what war, sex, and heartbreak were.

"Krüppel! Get up this second!"

Ines whipped her tired skull around, to see an SS man screaming at a creature lying facedown in the dirt. She winced, covered her ears and waiting for the blast of the gunshot, but miraculously, she saw the figure rise slowly, gripping her sticks she used for support. Only seeing the backside, Ines could glimpse short sepia hair and a stump of a left leg, bandaged with filth-caked gauze.

"Go to bunk five! You will recieve your shovel there!"

Ines watched as the shape hobbled off to said bunk, her bunk. She watched the orange traces of sunlight begin to flare out as night took over, hurrying back to her cabin--who knew if they would try and steal something--?

She skidded to a halt when she saw the Jew, a yellow star pinned on the front, sitting on the bottom bunk, a look of frustration on her wan face. She raised her head, and dark eyes narrowed upon seeing her, immediately shrinking back into a corner, injuries exposed by torn patches in clothing.

Ines knew she would not last with a missing limb, but this girl, she was a faint blue. A drop of indigo amongst the burning red, the smothering yellow.

"Maggots," The girl murmured in choppy German. "Maggots are crawling around in there, it'll become infected if I don't unwrap it, but I don't have any more bandages."

Ines watched the blue child, stunned. She, too, was still thinking about staying alive, even in such an awful place. Not surviving, but living.

Which was why she sat down beside her, resting an auburn hand with two fingers in splints on her olive shoulder. The girl jolted, frowning at her bruised face, her eye swollen shut.

"The infirmary. At night, I can take you there. But you must never, under any circumstances, go while Herr Doktor is there. He is a yellow man." She warned.

"Why should I trust you? Anyone could hurt me, at anytime. If the Nazis don't shoot me, I'll be killed fighting over bread." Came the sour reply, one hand clutching her stump.

"Because blue cannot burn as yellow does, it has nothing to fear from green. Blue cannot be conquered so easily by red, and only black may hide it, but not smother it."

The girl looked confused, but at last replied, "...Opa."

The gypsy's split lips curled into a smile. "My name is Ines. And look, do you like sweet things?"

Even if it meant another session, or a week of them, with the Standartenführer, she would shine a mountain of boots and take another broken arm, if it meant she would get a packet of sugar, a delicate cube of sweetness to dissolve in the mouth.

For pink and blue, after so long, had finally come, and even the cruel iron gates and the razor shards of barbed wire, starvation and rape, the blast of gunshots and the bodies decayed from disease, were mere trifles compared to a shared cup of milk and talking over tea and novels.

Muse List

Wed, 02 Dec 2009 23:53:13 GMT

Not including one-time or dead muses.

@ brofists

Himemiya Anthy
OU; Canon
Akio Arc
anthophyte

@ The Alphabet

Fanatical Faux-pas
Original Character; Another Note
2nd Generation Wammy's Child
f_anatical

Zebroid Zetetic
Original Character; Another Note
2nd Generation Wammy's Child
z_ebroid

Opsimath Obfuscate
Oriiginal Charcter; Another Note
2nd Generation Wammy's Child
o_psimath

Precious Parapraxis
Original Character; Another Note
2nd Generation Wammy's Child
p_recious

Wilting/Wormwood
Original Character; Another Note
2nd Generation Wammy's Child

Yawning Year
Original Character; Another Note
2nd Generation Wammy's Child

Funereal Floricide
Original Character; Another Note
2nd Generation Wammy's Child

Homeless

Otonashi Yukari
OU; Canon
Kiika Route
purgamentum

You win some, you lose some. C'est la ve.

Tue, 01 Dec 2009 08:44:15 GMT

Well, I didn't reach the 50,000 word mark by midnight. But you know what? I don't care. I finished my story (and yes I will stubbornly call it a novel, damn it) at 46,586 words, and I could find nothing more to add. I love it the way it is. I'm proud that I was able to whittle out an honest-to-god tale with characters and a semi-working plot in such a short time (even though I planned ahead like whoa). Yeah, this month was rough what with losing a chunk of my words when switching computers and getting sick and falling behind, but I did the best I could and I'm happy about that.

Hey, last year I did a measly 4k. 4K. THIS YEAR GOT TEN TIMES THAT.

So, hervictory, fliegenmaus, speaky_bean, and artgasming congratulations about winning, you guys. I'm proud of all of you. I had one hell of a ride anyway, ~~I don't need your stinkin' winner banners~~. I had fun, and that's what NaNoWriMo's all about.

FUCK YES

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 09:06:55 GMT

IT'S FINALLY OUT.

I swear to god

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 19:23:34 GMT

First I get way behind on my word count (haven't even hit 25k yet!) then I get sick with a bad cold.

It's like there's some deity that I majorly pissed off or something and now is trying to prevent me from finishing NaNo at all costs.

Full Metal Daemon Muramasa: First Impressions

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 06:17:58 GMT

Nitro+'s newest eroge, Full Metal Daemon Muramasa, shows us in an unflinchingly brutal and hideously nightmarish portrayal, that war is indeed hell.

Although no body is shown within the first few minutes of introduction, it hardly detracts from the atmosphere of chaos and carnage that we are thrown into, with agonized screams, clashing weapons, and countless explosions raging endlessly in the background, serenaded by a chilling choir of children throughout all the bloodshed.

Welcome to a world where there is murder and despair everywhere, and heroes are nonexistent. Soldiers in this day and era do not fight unprotected: they go into battle in full-body armor, a sort of minature mecha just a little larger than the average human, controlled from the inside. At first, the idea of a war being fought by people from the inside of robots seemed like it would ruin the harshness of it--after all, seeing metal chunks fly off is not as impressive as seeing a limb getting chopped off--but I quickly lost that notion upon watching a village being decimated with a single hit.

After the prologue, we're shown a far more peaceful side of life: siblings bickering, students going to school, girls being adorable. Class is normal, school is normal--

Until you look out the window and see the ravaged buildings. Which does shake things up, but then again, no one is untouched by the war in this world.

A few things do irk me about this eroge, though. The paperdolls strike me as too small, and are awkwardly placed to the sides of the screen, leaving huge gaps between them so we get empty spaces with nothing but the scenery between them, when I'd rather focus on the character. The paperdolls also never change expressions; instead, the face of the character speaking is featured next to the textbox, which changes instead. To have a disembodied face change while the doll remains with the same frozen expression make it seem as if I'm looking at the character through a window, and the doll is just a lifeless cardboard cutout. The textbox itself is placed smack dab in the center of the screen. It reads vertically, which doesn't bother me, but to place it right in the middle? I'd rather be able to read and look at the character, than have to read and then look at the paperdoll, who is squished all the way to the other side.

But don't let this fool you into thinking the entire presentation is awful. It's not. The female character designs are very charming, and the males' are all either badass or expectedly hideous, in the case of the villains.

Colors are used quite well in a rather muted, dark palette that fits the dark atmosphere of the game. There are even short clips which are entirely in 3D and wonderfully animated. They appear only during battle scenes, but it's still a huge treat to literally see the robot-armor slash, hack, and cause utter chaos in lovingly rendered graphics that look like they belong on a PS3 game.

The music varies from melacholy piano, to children singing in mournful-sounding latin, to variety of 'everyday' tunes with a very traditional asian sound, complete with shamisens and bamboo flutes. The majority of the tracks are quite enjoyable, while a few...are rather lacking.

The cast of characters first starts with the naive schoolgirl, Konatsu. She hangs out with her brother and his friend, seeming to have no female friends of her own. Konatsu can be very timid, and when she's worried, it's hard for her to stop dwelling on whatever's bothering her. She stutters like mad and blushes fiercely whenever she's faced with her teacher, who she has a huge crush on. The way she tends to nervously babble when seeing him is really rather cute.

Then there's the first herione, Kanae, a woman who plays cello and also has her own personal maid (the maid, by the way, looks well into her seventies). She never opens her eyes, either, which makes me a little uneasy. Kanae strikes me as very patient and polite; she almost never raises her voice, she's always smiling. Of course, something horrible could be lying beneath the surface, but we'll see. She's quite intriguing, anyhow.

Enter Ichijyou, the heroine with the most epic entrance I've ever seen since GSS. The protagonist, Konatsu, and her friends are having a brutal smackdown with a mobster to protect her from the creep, when cue a cold voice interrupting, and a little girl standing silhouetted against a bloody-red sunset with foreboding violins playing in the background. I love her already. Ichijyou is also quite the tsundere, as she's first recognized as 'the girl who said our group was full of idiots'. She really hates the protagonist at first glance, but seems to mellow a little when talking to her schoolmates.

Hey, remember the teacher Konatsu likes? He's absolutely average. Normal, flat side-character. Until he finds Konatsu and her friends in the school when they're apparently not supposed to be, but you know, he's a good, responsible guy, of course he'll just lecture them on safety and send them home.

WRONG. OH SO NIGHTMARE-INDUCINGLY WRONG.

He becomes infuriated, screaming about how eternity and God is gone now, about how there was only a little longer until a new, kinder world would be formed. Naturally, the kids have no idea what he's on about and are confused out of their minds, but the teacher just keeps rambling on while giant robot centipedes appear behind him. Which then break into the robot-armor, which the teacher dons--and then proceeds to repeatedly stab Konatsu's brother. If that weren't enough, he corners the terrified Konatsu and forces her friend to rape her, sparing no detail in showing us just how devastingly soul-crushing the entire ordeal is for her.

During all of this, keep in mind, is the same hopeful, triumphant music that played during their normal school days, but paired with the gruesome scene, it becomes a foul and almost disgusting reminder of the fun times they used to share.

But things get better, of course, when the protagonist shows up, and after an awesome mecha-battle, chases the teacher off. Konatsu's brother later goes out to meet with him to express his gratitude, even telling him "I trust in you" many, many times in a touching speech of hope and faith--

And the protagonist chops his head off.

...And here is where I stop and gawk at my monitor in shock and horror. Congratulations Nitro+, you broke my brain. The trial ends on this tragic note.

As the tagline of this eroge goes, 'this is not a story of heroes.'

CAPSLOCK GUARANTEED

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 15:54:45 GMT

SEE THIS ICON? SEE THE WHITE-HAIRED GIRL AND THE DARK-HAIRED BOY? THAT'S ME. NOW SEE THE GIRL THEY'RE STRANGLING. THAT'S MY NANO.

COWER, BITCH. I AM DEFEATING YOU.

and to give this post something of substance, have some yuri (NSFW).

Caucasus: First Impressions

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 04:50:58 GMT

I LOVE THIS GAME.

IT HAS A CAT. NAMED LOVECRAFT.

Okay, that out of the way. Within mere seconds of opening up Innocent Grey's newest masterpiece, Caucasus, I'm treated to a wide-screen presentation, and glorious music that immediately makes me think of mystery and murder--something dark and sinister, yet oh so seductive--is brewing. This is just thirty seconds in, and already the atmopshere is portrayed exquisitely by a single song of background music.

The background scenery is gorgeous. Honestly, they're like oil paintings, oozing sophistication and finery. The artwork is smooth, colored in muted palette, all the characters drawn in a realistic style, which is very eye-pleasing. The absence of moe moe eyes or unnatural hair colors is quite refreshing. To say nothing of the classy, elegant background music, which I already mentioned, but honestly deserves another. Images of captured princesses, the wealthy feeding on the most luxurious of lives, cautious killers hiding in the midst, are immediately conjured.

Of course, like all Innocent Grey titles, this too will lead to chaos and hell, breaking this beautifully polished world. Innocent Grey is a company that specializes in painfully detailed settings and stories that make the player immediately immersed in the tale, all of which lead to gory, brutal deaths. They are masters of the murder mystery genre of eroge, making the violence believable enough to make you flinch--or sometimes, haunt those of weaker hearts for nights, rather than having the gore border on cartoonish.

Another unique feature is the house being splayed out like a map that you can navigate through. Given that this is a murder mystery, I'm pleased with the charming, Clue-like method of moving around--it shows actual gameplay will be involved, rather than simply selecting choices.

In addition to picking what room to enter, you also can search around the room--in the fireplace, under the bed, by the carpet--it truly requires the player to actively involve themselves in order to solve the mystery. The entire mansion, it turns out, has something to examine in every room, if you aren't too distracted by the loving detail each individual room is rendered in.

Even more, if you run into someone while searching, you can talk to them and try to garner information, being given a detailed list of keywords, from which you can chose one to drop into conversation to try and incite a reaction. The list is enormous, and grows as you make deeper progress into the game, ranging from people's names, to furniture, to drinks. Once again, I say that Innocent Grey is a master at their craft.

Because I would probably blotch up the plot while describing it, I am copy-pasting it:

Caucasus takes place in Nanatsuki Village, located in the snow-plagued mountains. An old estate by the name of Nanatsu Mansion is located there, with a history of many strange and unexplained events having occurred there. These events are commonly referred to as being the "Curse of Nanatsuki".

The story begins on a path to the Nanatsuki Village, where a blizzard has stricken the two main characters. A young woman from the Nanatsu Mansion comes to their aid and provides them with shelter from the blizzard. On that same day, a wedding was being held at the Nanatsuki Mansion. Meanwhile, the snowstorm continued to rage outside and in increasing severity.

The next day, the headless body of the groom was found which quickly sparked a dispute over the matter of assets and inheritance and whether this was another event caused by the "Curse of Nanatsuki". The suspension bridge outside had become frozen by the blizzard, cutting off the route to the outside world.

...gee, why does this remind me of Umineko no Naku Koro ni? Part of me is desperately hoping it's not going to be the same story I've heard at least twice before (Ten Little Indians inspires Umineko inspires Caucasus?), but then I stop and remind myself. This is Innocent Grey. Even if the plot sounds like the same recycled tale, of course they're going to put their own unique spin on it, weaving a completely new story. Right?

Once the protagonist and his travelling companion are ushered out of the snow, they are brought to the Nanatsu Mansion. The solemn, mature mother, Maya, resides there with her maids and her two full-grown daughters. All of them are graceful, quiet, mannered--with the slight exception of the maids, who show formality to their mistresses, but don't act like living porcelain dolls. Maya's daughters are the kimono-clad Venio, a flash of color amongst all the blank white, who owns a black cat named Lovecraft. We also have the maternal Ai, who is much like her mother in build.

However, Venio, despite her cultured air and her soft words, beyond the wall erected by formalities she had been taught, has a spark of fire in her.

Quite a few times, her submissive tone slips, to reveal a sharp, angry voice beneath it--which she quickly smothers with polite, hushed murmurings. Once, when speaking with her maid, Venio takes on this casual, deeper tone in exasperation--which she immediately forces back into girlish quiet. Another time, when angered, she starts to shout in displeasure before stifling herself, giving a harmless smile.

However, once the pretenses are dropped, Venio starts speaking in downright slangy tones, getting annoyed and frustrated, allowing her smile to vanish in place of a scowl, her arms to cross; she takes on a defiant pose that's the exact opposite of her usual feminine stance.

We also have the protagonist's companion, a young girl named Kirihara Soko. Soko is polite to others, if they are polite to her. She doesn't scorn the maids for any of their blunders and treats them with respect, just as she treats the other women of the house. She does, however, get annoyed with the protagonist, waking him up and interrupting him in conversation, and generally acting like a younger sister to him, even though they aren't related. She also isn't quite in-tune with the wealthy life around her; Soko asks a servant for cola to drink with breakfast, leaving the poor girl flustered and confused, having never heard of such a drink. In fact, the maid doesn't even know that cola is something you drink.

Then there's Akane, one of the maids. And, despite her being employed in such a fine mansion that leaves little room for error, Akane makes mistake after mistake after mistake. She screams when she sees Venio's cat, she's incompetent at cleaning, she's clumsy, and above all, prone to frustrated emotional outbursts, having low self-esteem due to her constant errors. But, for whatever reason, she continues to be a servant rather than be fired.

Akane apologizes for her mishaps constantly, but is so upset she ends up raising her voice to a yell as she begs the protagonist or her mistress Venio for forgiveness. You feel sorry for the poor girl as she babbles on, nearly in tears.

Then, the scene shifts from the protagonist's point of view to an unknown's, where the text takes up the entire screen. Innocent Grey is known for doing this to portray the crimes the villian does behind the hero's back; we're seeing things from the antagonist's eyes now. And, as we creep through the house, we discover Akane, cornered in the infirmary. She's leaning against the wall, arms crossed over her middle in a defensive gesture, her expression uneasy and almost frightened. Her posture screams of wanting to escape, as she hesitantly asks the villian (and through the villian, us) for mercy. Her voice falters and cracks several times, and then, it's revealed Akane has undoubtedly been trapped in a sexually abusive relationship, where she is being dominated against her will, as she lowers her undergarments and shows she has been carrying an artificial phallus inside of her the entire day.

The plot thickens, yes indeed.

But wait! There's a third sister of the Nanatsu Mansion. Shion, a girl with white-blond hair and scarlet eyes, is the one getting married--to none other than Rokuyo Isamu--the same man who assulted Akane the previous night! Rokuyo seems cheerful, of course he would be--but Shion looks uneasy, her eyes averted and wearing a frown, her vows quiet and almost hesitant.

Also, apparently Shion sleeps in a coffin. Fucking. Epic.

But, the 'happy' occasion doesn't last. Remember, Innocent Grey produces first and foremost, murder mysteries. Here comes the murder.

The next morning, Rokuyo is found dead in his room, an ax buried in his head. Personally, I'm guessing our hesitant bride did it.

And just as our protagonists prepare to leave, the blizzard that stormed overnight comes into the picture. In comes the broken bridge, trapping them all in the Nanatsu Mansion.

Here comes the 'mystery' part.

Sugar-Coated Freaks: First Impressions

Sun, 18 Oct 2009 23:35:53 GMT

Maybe I should just create another journal for my eroge rants, huh?

Anyway, Littlewitch's newest game Sugar-Coated Freaks, scheduled for release mid-December, is quite a pleasant surprise.

Those who are fans of Littlewitch's older games will see a dramatic change from what they used to produce, to what they create now. Which may be good or bad, depending on your tastes.

Compare:

Quartett, their second game, is unvoiced, but has no paper dolls whatsoever, the presentation through the entire game being nothing but CG. Not only is this downright amazing, if only because of what it must've cost, but it's also all vibrantly painted in Oyari Ashito's gorgeous style. For the background music, there's fantastic orchestral pieces that sound just as good as anything by Tchaikovsky. Instead of the standard text box at the bottom of the screen, there are little speech bubbles. There are also effects like falling snow, and moving sound effects.

Now take their newest game, Sugar-Coated Freaks. It's almost entirely voiced, for one, and uses the typical text box at the bottom, which, in my opinion, is a step down from the text bubbles. However, the colors are far more brighter and used a lot more liberally--which is a good thing. There are paper dolls, which means a lack of the all-CG treat in Quartett, but they also blink, in addition to a plethora of effects, including camera panning, three different kinds of sparkles, hearts, floating question marks, and puffs of air to give the paper dolls more life. The music is less classical, but still very nice. There's a lullaby-sounding tune comprised of bells instead of Quartett's dramatic violins, and a jazzy tune with horns, pianos, and violins mixing together in a catchy, upbeat rhythm instead of a melodic piano solo. There is also a number of surprisingly somber songs in Sugar-Coated Freaks' soundtrack, which hold a peaceful, yet bittersweet vibe.

But given that each game has a different atmosphere, it's best that Quartett has its own blend of music and a more classic art style, while Sugar-Coated Freaks' has a more modern flavor in both visual and audio to match up with this new direction Littlewitch is taking. Both are different, but one is not necessarily better.

Onto the characters: First, there's Tamako, the princess hailing from a foreign country. She's acts with great solemnity towards others, and doesn't speak often. When she does talk, her words are formal, almost void of emotion. She is followed everywhere by a maid who takes care of her, who, in contrast to Tamako's detatched attitude, is far more cheerful than her serious mistress.

Tamako, a Japanese girl in an assumedly European country, also takes the liberty to redecorate the protagonist's room with a flavor more traditional to her homeland. The protagonist doesn't appreciate this, but can't exactly whine to a princess about what she can and can't do. Tamako, on the other hand, merely gives him a blank look and asks what's wrong.

Alright, so maybe Tamako isn't entirely a frozen-hearted girl. She may not have any kind of tact in social situations, but she likes her new home, the food they eat...she finds pleasure in the simple things. She says she had fun talking with the protagonist, and even shows a hint of a smile behind her hand. She's not incapable of attachment, at least; she simply expresses emotions in a far more subdued way than the rest of the more enthusiastic cast. She may be ignorant about a lot of things, but I find Tamako to be not all that bad.

Tamako is also extremely naive--as she later starts taking off her kimono in front of the protagonist without a hint of embarrassment, only confusion when he freaks out.

Then, there's the obligatory loli, Jill. She's the princess of Ruritania (the country where the story takes place), and about as classic tsundere as you can get. Yells at her older brother, does the haughty 'hmph' noises, and calls the protagonist an idiot within five minutes of meeting him. Some would call this being a brat. However, I find this endearing--this just means that when Jill's dere side is revealed, she'll be acting so damn cute it'll make her bratty tsun side a nice combination to prevent tooth decay from fluff overload. Also, her theme song is awesome and makes me feel like dancing.

As the trial goes on, Jill is seen battling with feelings of inferiority as Tamako, the newcomer, seems to one-up her on everything. She, who is royalty in this country, is being shown up (though it's not malicious on Tamako's part) and looks pathetic compared to this other princess who can do anything and is just so adorable and demure--while she seems like yesterday's news.

Then we have Len--who really suprised me. From her character design: short hair, princely pose, I expected her to be a solemn, noble type. Imagine my surpise when I get a flustered girl on her knees, apologizing to a puppy for scaring it.

Len: "I'M S-S-S-SORRY! I'M NOT SCARY!"

She refers to herself using the boyish boku instead of the usual watashi, though, so perhaps I was partly-right on my prince theory? Len is very friendly and enthusiastic, and maybe a tad overly well-mannered, as she calls protagonist 'amazing' and thanks him profusely, along with her formal speech pattern.

Finally, we have Marie. She appears to be the most normal out of them: a friendly, hardworking, honest girl who doesn't have a vile temper, nor a loud go-getter attitude.

I think the crowning moment of awesome is when Jill, Tamako, Marie, and Len are eating out in a restaurant, and one of the students from their school starts talking badly about Jill, referring to her as a 'lost princess'. As Jill grows more and more upset, Tamako steps in, and in her cool monotone, tells him to shut up. However, just as it seems they're going to turn on Tamako next, who else comes to the rescue but Marie, kicking the guy in the face.

However, it later leads to disaster as Jill catches Tamako in the hallway later that evening, looking near-hysteric as she confronts Tamako.

Jill: Well, how does it feel? Are you happy?! In front of everyone, you--you made me look like such a fool!
Jill: I don't like you! I hate you! Why did you have to come here...

Tamako remains silent, going to bed without a word, but later confides to the protagonist about how she worries for Jill, especially after the other princess' hateful confession.

To add to the drama, it turns out that the boy at the restaurant is not the only one out to get Jill. There's a girl who seems to be planning something nasty for our tsundere princess as well. So far, she has constantly mocked and insulted Jill in a passive-aggressive way, but I have a feeling it will turn into something far more sinister.

There we have it. Mystery, intrigue, scenery/audio porn, and adorable girls. Just what Littlewitch does best.

What Beautiful Hopes: First Impressions

Tue, 06 Oct 2009 03:53:49 GMT

One thing I dislike about eroge. All too often, while the heroine is getting screwed, they lose all facet of their personality. They often turn into raging sluts who beg for orgasm and will do anything to the hero in any damn pose he wants, even if they are supposed to be incredibly shy out of bed.

Even more annoying is they have the habit to scream out every little thing that is being done to them. I know, it's an eroge, it's supposed to be erotic to the (assumedly male) player, it's not like they can cut out audio entirely. But do we really have to hear the girl squealing/crying/moaning about the girth of the hero or how good it feels every few seconds? I think, for her first time, the girl would be a hell of a lot more embarrased, or at least try to not wake up an entire neighborhood.

Where does this small rant lead me? What Beautiful Hopes, made by the company Liar Soft, is giving the eroge ban a big 'fuck you' with their newest piece of work. Some girls go far beyond just cat ears or a tail--one girl's lower body is literally that of a snake's. There are also two lolis in corsets--one of which is at one point seated in what looks like an electric chair taken to hideous and lethal extremes. Not to mention incest, and of course, a brothel full of young women in various states of undress. And this is in just the trial.

And within this lovely, mind-trippy eroge, I think I've finally found that one heroine. Who doesn't moan everytime something happens. Who doesn't act as if she has some disorder where the nerves in her clitoris are all over her skin. Who isn't, to put it simply, a bag of very pretty meat to derive pleasure from in bed.

The best part? She's the star attraction of the brothel. She's supposed to be the vapid type who can move nicely but not much else, with no purpose other than a living sextoy.

Instead? Behind the flirtatious smile and seductive voice, Nanai is a discontent young woman, and while her body is forced to do things a certain way, her mind and emotions certainly aren't invested in what she does.

Prime example--Nanai is shown having sex with a customer. Her expression is ecstatic and aroused, and the way her body is splayed shows no hesitation. But instead of hearing nothing but Nanai's 'erotic' noises and mindless babble, we get to hear a monologue of her thoughts.

Turns out, she's actually quite reflective. She's anything but mindless. No matter what trashy things come out of her mouth, the entire time, she's emotionally detached from the situation. This isn't the first time she's been with a man, nor will it be the last. She simply doesn't give a damn that this is probably a huge ego boost for the man, that he thinks he's finally got the prettiest woman of the brothel moaning under him, that he thinks that she wants him. She simply plays along, and when she's finished pretending to orgasm, she smiles and tells the man--whose name she never even bothered to learn-- "I love you, customer."

That takes guts, right there. She practically tells him that what they did doesn't matter, as long as she gets her pay. She calls him nothing but a customer, one of perhaps hundreds she sees every day of her life.

"No, it isn't a lie. I love you."

As long as she gets paid, that is.

Then we have Mimiru, the half girl, half snake who is the hero's friend. ~~The first thing I thought was 'boy, her H-scenes would be incredibly awkward'.~~ This is something I like about Liar Soft. They create girls that are purposely unwinnable, but give them just as much depth as a normal heroine.

Mimiru acts very cheerful and carefree, and her rather strange body is completely accepted by society (but then again, given how plain bizarre the rest of the world is, she must look pretty normal). She's caring towards the hero and also dotes on the younger children. Then one night, Mimiru tries to convince a little girl named Toto to come home with her. It's clear they at least have a sisterly affection for each other, but despite their friendship, they probably haven't known each other for long--Mimiru doesn't even know where Toto lives. But such a request doesn't seem outrageously out of place: it's a big city, after all, and for a child to be out at night is asking for trouble. Toto refuses, and before Mimiru can react, Toto has vanished.

Mimiru is then immediately confronted by a man swaggering out of the brothel, cloaked in all white, his face concealed. He gives Mimiru a bad feeling, to put it mildly. No, scratch that, he terrifies her. So much so that he has seemed to trigger memories Mimiru has kept repressed. Like the fact she she apparently murdered the hero's father.

However, before we can learn more, Mimiru is too occupied with having a mental breakdown, and in this moment of weakness, the man kidnaps her.

Oh, wait, Mimiru's woken up! The last thing she can recall is the man mind-raping her--and then comes the awful realization that she had killed her best friend's parent. She is, naturally, torn apart by this, and apologizes tearfully--even though he isn't around to hear, Mimiru just wants him to know that she truly is regretful.

Mimiru is originally assumed to be a token childhood friend character, whose only role is to support the hero, or else fade into obscurity if she's not winnable. Instead, we get a vulnerable young girl who just recieved the biggest shock of her life, and is likely to permanently break her chipper persona and warp it into one much more troubled. Best case scenario, Mimiru will recover, her faith renewed. And while this can happen, there's also the possiblity of Mimiru being completely broken, and stay that way. If she were a normal heroine, the former would obviously happen, but given that she is a sub-character, and one given such time and care put into her, she may become a shadow of her former self, and serve to increase the conflict between the hero and his chosen heroine. She either recieves mundane happiness or misery, but either way she is eventually forgotten, and sadly, that's often the ultimate fate for bit-characters in eroge.

But given that this is Liar Soft, there may be an epic awakening for Mimiru yet. She may indeed be lifted further out of the character sketch, and breathe life into the story; not as a rejected heroine, but as a strong character who can thrive without the hero.

The chances are slim, but they're there.

Finally, we have the actual heroine of the tale. She's first seen being brought to a luxurious room, and she's suprised by all the finery--but even when she realizes that the room is her prison, she is compliant, submissive--she doesn't even try to fight back against her captors.

She also sits in this device that looks like an electric chair taken to disturbing levels--of her own free will. That's right: no one forces her to do it, she straps herself in all of her own accord--and then it's revealed she does this every day. Why the self-inflicted punishment? Why the brutal torture? It's never revealed, nor does she let on that she's probably in unimaginable agony--she never shows an expression beyond a faint smile or a grim frown, nor does she ever raise her voice from a quiet monotone.

Even when she's led out, and shoved into a room full of mirrors, and ghostly hands come out of the mirrors to snatch her, she doesn't struggle. She does eventually call for help, but it's only at the very last moment, and even then, it's literally a huge struggle for her to even speak the words 'save me'. After she is saved by the hero and comes to live with him, she goes through no change from her blank, doll-like behavior. I'm curious to what has reduced her to such a state, where emotion is something that she cannot or will not handle, for whatever reason.

To give you an idea of just how much this game messes with your head, here is some background scenery.

GUN-KATANA: Analysis: Sakamaki Yuri and Mouring the Loss of Normality

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 04:36:59 GMT

An examination of Himena's personality, and the impact Yuri has thusfar had on her. A bit of summarization of the events that happen early in the game will have to be spoiled here, but I'll try to save the details for a full Yuri analysis. No images this time.

Himena had been assigned to go undercover and infiltrate a school to hunt for any lurking NON-HUMANS. She took the guise of a transfer student in order to blend in, hiding the unremovable collar around her neck (which adds up how many points she's harvested for each kill) with a scarf. Himena made friends with her blissfully ignorant classmate, Sakamaki Yuri, on her mission. Yuri was an average girl: giggling over boys and chatting over mundane things, in vivid contrast to Himena's life prone to tragedy and horrifing carnage.

Then this friendship came to a bloody end when Himena discovered the corpses of Yuri and several other classmates, having been slaughered by Mukai, a NON-HUMAN who had been posing as a teacher. Himena chased after Mukai, but faltered when coming across the scarf Yuri had been planning to give to her. Because of this brief pause to mourn, Mukai escaped, Himena's collar was zeroed, and the plot was sent into motion.

Several weeks after that tragedy, Himena has more-or-less become accustomed to her new fast-paced regime of endless NON-HUMAN hunting, which she now has to do every day, nearly all day, if she ever wants to regain the points to buy her freedom. She hasn't shown any remorse over Yuri's death since the incident, having been emotionally exhausted by Kureha re-entering her life, and all the concern, humiliation, and frustration that followed.

However, one night, the scene abruptly shifts from Himena's quarters to the school she had been infiltrating at the beginning. And in the hauntingly familiar classroom, Yuri is chatting as innocently as ever, as if she had never been murdered in front of Himena's eyes.

Then I start getting a really bad feeling when Yuri says she has a present for Himena.

Suprise! Guess what the gift is? That's right, it's the bloody scarf Yuri was going to give to Himena before her death. The cutesy music stops in favor of a sinister, low note being continuously played. The bland appearance of classroom fades out, revealing blood-splattered walls and windows smeared with bloody handprints--the exact scene Himena had found Yuri's corpse at.

Himena stares at the scarf in growing horror, reality beginning to come back to her, while Yuri's pleasant conversation turns into weak groans of pain.

Himena: (whimpering) No...no...
Yuri: Himena-chan...
Himena: Ah...a-ah...
Yuri: It hurts...it's so painful...
Himena: S-stop! Yuri, stop!
Yuri: Save me, Himena-chan!

Himena screams and wakes up, her heart pounding. She realizes it had all been a horrible nightmare, and though Hyou tries to comfort her, that still doesn't stop Himena from breaking down and sobbing.

This little scene has provided ~~plenty of yuri fodder~~ the brief insight into Himena's mind that really protrayed how deep an impact Yuri's friendship left on her. Until this point, it could've been assumed that Himena had forgotten Yuri in favor of her old friend Kureha, but it's clear Himena is grieving. This reveals a darker side that Himena has: that, despite her daunting challenge to eliminate armies of NON-HUMANS, being emotionally isolated from her old friend, and sharing her brother's burden, even though she puts on an optimistic face and tries to do her best with a positive outlook, beneath that lies a mangled mess of raw emotions. Himena knows, without any sugar-coated delusions, that she can never return to the normality she once had. She can never have the comfort of her parents again, or the simple everyday life of a student. This overwhelms her, and Himena cries for the loss of not only her friend, but of everything she has had and once cherished.

But by morning, Himena is back to a sunny, determined attitude. At night she allows herself to drown her sorrow in sex or self-pitying tears, but come dawn and she is prepared to wrack up as many points as possible, for that fleeting chance to buy back her freedom, and become a normal girl, like she so craves.

But Himena, even if she does manage to earn a life of uninterrupted peace, will never be normal. Because normal people are passive, and unextraordinary. Himena falls victim to reality, but buries it deep beneath her cheeriness, fueled by sheer will to turn around her fate of constantly fighting. She continues to succumb to her tragedy and just as quickly recovers, never relenting: she is always going to struggle until the bitter end. Delusional or not, whether she's withholding her true emotions, that's up to interpretation; but Himena shall never stop, and that determination is something to be admired, not mourned.

GUN-KATANA: First Impressions: Muimi Haruka

Wed, 16 Sep 2009 23:29:02 GMT

So, I decided to go stock up on bazookas before heading off to battle the island full of spiders of doom. Instead of getting greeted by the overweight, lecherous shopkeeper who normally runs it, I get a young woman with pink hair and the most adorable voice ever. She could make lolis green with jealously.

Haruka refers to herself in third-person, calls Himena 'Hime-tan', and fawns over Himena and her brother. When she discovers that Himena and Hyou are sister and brother, she goes on a tangent about how nice it would be to have such cool siblings. Then the shopkeeper offers to 'be her big brother' with the innuendo very much obvious, and Haruka starts to giggle and says, "Uwaa~ I'm so happy to have such a nice big brother~~~!". The shopkeeper laughs with her, when he sees Himena still there and abruptly frowns.

Shopkeeper: What, you're still here?
Himena: I did come to buy things, you know...
Haruka: Ah, that's right! Welcome to our shop~~!

I love this game.

So far, Haruka seems air-headed and sweet, but given that this is GUN-KATANA, there's probably more beneath the surface. ~~Or maybe she's just a ditz.~~ Nahhh.

goddamn I love TvTroupes

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 17:19:08 GMT

the TVTROPES meme ☺

GUN-KATANA: Analysis: Kazato Kureha

Sat, 12 Sep 2009 02:03:52 GMT

Since its arrival, I've been playing the eroge GUN-KATANA (made by the company Black Cyc) religiously. It's that good, even though the bosses are beyond frustrating (island covered with giant acid-spitting spiders, armed with nothing but a gun that spews bullets with all the effectiveness of pillows). And even though I've only been introduced to a few characters of its immense and colorful cast, I'm already looking at them far too in-depth. Expect several more analyses to follow and to expand as I get deeper into the game.

I don't even like Kureha, but that doesn't mean she can't be done justice.

When Kureha and Himena first meet after the latter wakes up in her new home, Kureha is sympathetic to Himena's plight, but offers no aid. She is accepting of their situation, possessing a hopeless and cynical attitude, having succumbed to the futility of escaping her prison that is the Hatebreed Institute long before Himena's arrival. Kureha has endured its tortures for far longer than Himena, after all, having to endure rape and the loss of individuality over the years as she is forcibly molded into a Slayer. She even laughs when Himena brings up plans to escape, frequently reminding her to not feel sentimental, and growing irritated when she starts to pity her, brusquely aborting all conversation. Kureha doesn't try to explore the emotions or possible motives of NON-HUMANS when Himena gently suggests it, standing firm by the ingrained belief that all NON-HUMANS are unredeemable animals, unapologetically calling Himena's beloved brother, who is cursed with NON-HUMAN heritage, a monster to her face.

Kureha's lover, Sakiyada Miroku, acts vile and crass to her, treating her as if she were inferior to him--and that's exactly how he sees her. Kureha, who is far from submissive when with Himena and others, becomes a compliant slave around Sakiyada, humiliating herself at his will, and staying at his side despite the abuse he puts her through. Kureha gives vague reasoning behind her choice to stay with him: "because he's strong", though she doesn't try to redeem Sakiyada in any way. She acknowledges that he is nothing but a sadistic, depraved individual.

Himena: "But, you're fond of him, aren't you?"
Kureha: "I'm stupid, aren't I?"
Himena: "Not really."
Kureha: "...You really don't understand at all."
Himena: "What do you mean?"
Kureha: "I love him. I want his power."

Kureha possesses extremely masochistic tendencies, along with a plausible dose of outright denial. She takes genuine pleasure out of the borderline rape that Sakiyada pressures her into; she is humiliated and degraded, but Kureha is always begging for more in the end, and never strays.

Even after Himena and Kureha have both been released from Hatebreed as enslaved NON-HUMAN hunters, and the girls reunite after several years, Kureha is still travelling with Sakiyada. She leaves Himena behind to stay in Sakiyada's company--not that he would've given her a choice--but their separation has yet to last long, as Kureha's following of Sakiyada often leads her right back to Himena.

Kureha has the same reluctance to associate with her, but now, she also doesn't mind teasing Himena in an especially sadistic and smug way. She becomes furious if Himena attempts to so much as tell Sakiyada that his treatment of her is wildly abusive, yet acts oddly tolerant of Hyou, despite his NON-HUMAN blood.

Kureha is still participating in a horrid power-play that never ceases to scorn her, sometimes even getting off on it. She's seemed to have adopted some of the same cruelty as her captor, but also loathes to leave someone to fend for themselves, or to be the one dragging someone else behind. She may not be an admirable or even a valiant character, but Kureha is certainly a most fascinating one.

Whether she ends up breaking away from Sakiyada and finding independence, or continues along as a puppet on a string, she remains to be someone who begs a deeper look than just what's on the surface.

Sat, 29 Aug 2009 16:44:47 GMT

The fact that I haven't hollowed my uterus out with an ice-scream scoop yet must say something about my tolerance for pain.

also uh wow i'm behind on my RP

Yes, another RP rant. This time, with italics.

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 03:44:15 GMT

I love a certain game to pieces. It's wonderful. The premise is gloriously dark, to say nothing of its sheer level of detail of its settings and the background information. The characters I follow are intimidatingly and amazingly accurate, it really feels like I'm taking out a piece from whatever canon they're from. It panders to nearly everything I like in a game: plot, supreme character interaction, torture, psychological breakdowns, amputees, evil circuses, corrupt authority figures, mindfuck relationships, and it doesn't skimp on anything.

I spent literal months writing and agonizing over the details the application after I had chosen a character. I deliberately chose someone from an obscure series, so he wouldn't be taken before I apped him. I replayed the game twice to make sure I had his characterization down. Finally, after the painful editing process, after weeks of waiting for school to end so I could have the time to play, I posted his application, and finally joined such an amazing game. Everyone was incredibly welcoming, and it soothed my anxiety. I thought that I had gotten all worried for nothing, and that I would finally be able to have fun role-playing.

My character is a very childish one, he's starved for attention and extremely possessive, actively seeking out other people to stave off the horrible loneliness, yet suspects them at every turn and ends up 'punishing' them if their attention may be wandering towards anyone but him. He would need to forge bonds with other characters in order to truly bring out his cynical, bitter side; so I had him join a circus, as it was where he would most fit in, and the circus being a place where people frequented--even if they were the most twisted sort of individuals, but so is my character, so it worked.

I had one log that died after a few comments, which was okay, as it was my first attempt to break into a new game. But I felt too awkward to comment on any characters' journals. ICly, my character would normally just pop in and mess with whoever he was interacting with, without being shy. But canon-wise, he instigates the first word. He always leads the conversation, playing with the other speaker and leading the talk to where he wants it to go. This is where I'm supposed to take creative liberties for the sake of RP activity and have him say hello anyway, since he could still do all that, and character interaction is what the game's about after all. But I just clamp up at my character suddenly barging into a stranger's personal thoughts on their journal and stating his opinion. I feel like I would ruin something. My character doesn't comment at random. He doesn't get involved at all unless he feels like he's contributing to something that could turn out well later. For example, if he sees someone on the street, he would ignore them; they don't need help, they don't seem interesting. But if he sees someone starving and injured on the street, he would go to them and aid them, since then it would have potential for a budding friendship.

The third journal post turned out well, it led to a log, a log which I killed, because I couldn't reply due to a slew of things that went on at that time: broken internet, relatives visiting, other RPs to tend to... And I just feel so awful about it. I haven't apologized to the mun. I haven't written an excuse on the OOC comm either. Because I don't want to draw attention to the fact that I let a thread die and that I don't bother picking it up, even when I have nothing going on now, because I would feel awkward replying weeks later to an old comment without trying to justify myself a million ways. The point is: I didn't reply when I should've, and now it's too late. I feel too awkward to make any journal posts, because my character doesn't really know anyone there. I feel too awkward to make any logs, because to just randomly ping muns for interaction seems like a social faux-pas. There's an event coming up, but I feel like I've already made such a huge mess I should just sit it out.

It's such a lovely game. A wonderful, fantastic game that I've never had such pleasure to follow. It's so much fun to simply be a bystander, and yet I so very much want to be a part of it myself, and I keep sabotaging my own efforts. Because I'm shy. Because I lack confidence. Despite the reassurance from muns and the admins of the game, some of which are on my friends' list, I feel so damn scared.

I really want to play. But I feel like I'll mess up something wonderful. I don't want to drop, but how can I take a hiatus when I have the muse, I just don't have the grace to not spoil the ambience?

Mon, 17 Aug 2009 06:38:47 GMT

I can't believe I'm going to be a senior in less than two weeks. Because senior reminds me of the words senior discount which reminds me of getting old and wrinkly, which is just...not a picture I savor. Yes, I know it's ridiculous to worry about aging at this age.

Aging-angst aside, I'm actually pretty excited about going back to school. Summer has been pretty dull, so school is some excitement to look forward to, as long as I don't get the same math teacher as last year. Because if I do get that same maniac, I'm transferring faster than you can comprehand. The electives I signed up for were Drama 2, Psychology, Forensic Science, and Japanese 2, and I'm pretty sure I'm getting Japanese, but we'll see what the other one is, since I haven't got my schedule mailed to me yet. As for how my RP activity fares...well, as long as I RP on the weekends (or whenever I don't have a mountain of homework at stake) it should be okay. I just need to keep the mindset that homework and schoolwork > internet, no matter how much I dislike it.

Right, and November is coming up. And you know what that means? Of course you do, it means NaNoWriMo '09! (And right after I said homework comes first...but I plan on managing my time better this year.) I'm stuck between continuing the story I never completed last year--yes, the one with lesbian stalkers (Viola) and armless amputees (Walter), ringing any bells? Or this new dark fantasy one that has a male protagonist for once, with a far more complex plot. Oh! And there's magic in it. And none of the namby-pamby wand shit. It's all incantations, and if they break the rules? The witch/warlock gets their mouth stitched shut. Or tongue cut out. Or both. Hardcore, yeah?

And that's about it.

1) What author do you own the most books by?
Chuck Palanhiuk, even though I only really liked one of his books.

2) What book do you own the most copies of?
hmm. Legend of the Twilight Vol 3?

3) Did it bother you that both those questions ended with prepositions?
Nope.

4) What fictional character are you secretly in love with?
~~Too many.~~ uh, let me count. Violet Baudelaire, Himemiya Anthy, Justine Emma Genevieve Delacroix...

5) What book have you read the most times in your life?
Lolita, Ada or Ardor, and Flowers in the Attic are probably all tied.

6) What was your favorite book when you were ten years old?
I don't think I had one.

7) What is the worst book you've read in the past year?
...Breaking Dawn.

8) What is the best book you've read in the past year?
Something Wicked This Way Comes.

9) If you could force everyone you tagged to read one book, what would it be?
Aw, only one? Lolita~

10) Who deserves to win the next Nobel Prize for Literature?
I don't knooowww.

11) What book would you most like to see made into a movie?
Lolita. And one that's done properly, that actually manages to take the amazing prose and transfer it into film with all the fucked-up-ness and pedovibes intact. Oh! And Something Wicked This Way Comes or Flowers in the Attic. Both those books deserve movies that are loyal to its source.

12) What book would you least like to see made into a movie?
All Twilight books.

13) Describe your weirdest dream ~~involving a writer, book, or literary character~~.
The nightmare about me crawling down chimneys, getting lost in the city surrounded by thugs carrying human heads on pikes, making friends with a policewoman, jumping over pits of acid, and finally getting death threats from my Japanese teacher who said I needed to be home by midnight or else he'd hire a man in a bear suit to come and shoot me.

14) What is the most lowbrow book you've read as an adult?
I'm an adult?

15) What is the most difficult book you've ever read?
Ada or Ardor, or House of Leaves.

16) What is the most obscure Shakespeare play you've seen?
...idk, I don't like Shakespeare.

17) Do you prefer the French or the Russians?
French.

18) Roth or Updike?
Updike.

19) David Sedaris or Dave Eggers?
Who and who?

20) Shakespeare, Milton, or Chaucer?
Milton, I guess.

21) Austen or Eliot?
See answer for number nineteen.

22) What is the biggest or most embarrassing gap in your reading?
Twelve years old. Ah, the drivel I read...

23) What is your favourite novel?
LOLITA. ADA OR ARDOR. FLOWERS IN THE ATTIC. SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES. THE END OF ALICE. EXQUISITE CORPSE. PHANTOMS IN THE BRAIN. WELCOME TO WAHOO.

24) Play?
No Exit by Jean-Paul Sartre.

25) Poem?
Don't have one.

26) Essay?
Anthy As the Viewer's Mirror.

27) Short story?
The Little Sisters of Eluria by Stephen King.

28) Work of nonfiction?
None.

29) Who is your favorite writer?
Vladimir Nabokov. Hands down, the man was a genius.

30) Who is the most overrated writer alive today?
Stephanie Meyer.

31) What is your desert island book?
I'm assuming you mean a book I'd take to an island with me. Go see number 23.

32) And... what are you reading right now?
GUN-KATANA and Gore Screaming Show.

RP rant time

Wed, 12 Aug 2009 23:40:03 GMT

So I joined rplanguageclub because I figured it'd be good practice, but whether I'll actually play there is up in the air now. Some of the Japanese I can understand, but some of it goes over my head.

...though I really shouldn't be playing in any new places anyway, but since it's a dressing room at least I wouldn't have to worry about activity checks. Things have been slow for me at brofist_tv which is sad because it's such a great comm. I'll have to make another post there soon.

And as for neo_rpg ...I fail. Big time. But I don't want to drop, not after all the effort I put into choosing just the right character and making his app perfect and all the months I stalked it. I really love that place, I just seem so awkward in it.

Rule of Rose fic: The Waking Hour, Diana/Meg, R

Sat, 08 Aug 2009 16:49:27 GMT

Title: The Waking Hour
Fandom: Rule of Rose
Rated: R
Pair: Diana/Meg
Word count: 707
Summary: A dream within a dream.
Warnings: Smut between two underaged girls and hints of pedophilia.
Disclaimer: I do not own Rule of Rose.
Notes: I've been forming a habit of writing between the hours of 2-4 a.m. wtf, internal sleeping cycle. Written for justprompts, the prompt being I Hate You by Sick Puppies.

I hate you when you're gone
I hate you turn me on
I hate the way I need you when
I don't know where you are

Meg struggled to catch her breath, her hand small and sweaty in Diana's tight grip as the Duchess led her down the carpeted hallway, spiraling down the winding stairs, past the Clover rooms, and into the cramped and dirty stall that had, over time, become their rendevouz point, the mad, masochistic flutterings of her heart entirely worth the stink of urine and the fainter one of perfumey floral, completely well-earned as she listened to the clatter of footsteps: Amanda fumbling with a stolen tube of lipstick, or Eleanor dragging her birdcage into the toilet with her, and she and Diana had to hastily pull up their feet so as not to be seen on the stained tile.

The lenses of her glasses were smudged, and it would be quite difficult to see anything with clarity unless she gave them a good wipe, but Meg didn't need to see as petulant, greedy fingers, so clever and sharp that they could only belong to the older girl, forced her to lean back against the wall: her frame outlined by the crayon graffiti, her blond hair, which she had thought was too short to be mussed in the first place, splayed against filthy tile and her headband lying discarded on the floor. She blindly reached out, feeling for the green tie and wrapping it around her fingers like a noose, bringing Diana's face close enough that she could still smell Hoffman's coffee on her breath.

"Are you trying to strangle me, Baroness?" The words were tinged with amusement, the Duchess' fingers cupping the side of her skull and tracing the rim of her ear. Meg shivered, her glasses sliding down the bridge of her nose.

"Get rid of those silly things," This time, Diana was impatient as she snatched them off, letting them fall somewhere on the ground. Her green eyes were reduced to flickery blurs, but Meg could still make out the dark mischief in their gaze. Somewhere inside herself, she could feel a faint smoldering, the sensation burning strongly between her legs. And burning really was the best way to describe it: not in the sense that it caused her to writhe in agony, but the untouchable blaze that only grew as the seconds marched on.

Diana never kissed her, even as she pushed up the younger girl's wool vest and pawed at her undeveloped chest, for a gesture that tender was something only achieved in the midst of one of her wildest dreams, from which she woke up shaky and sweating and exhilarated. Even as nails scrabbled at the waistband of her faded green skirt, the Duchess' actions were predatory, sexual; never romantic like Meg hoped. Diana was no noble prince or benevolent king; she was the rough and weathered beggar, who stole from the rich and gave only to herself, with a brutal attractiveness that only increased the thrill of it all.

Meg shuddered, entwining her fingers in the girl's burgundy hair, Diana's triumphant expression darkening before her flawed vision like candlelight. She heard the crunch of her glasses breaking, trapped under Diana's shoe, and closed her eyes to savor the delightfully deep touches the girl imparted to her with every flick of her fingers.

And when she opened them, she was lying in her soaked pajamas, staring wide-eyed at the ceiling.

Meg turned on her side, and saw Diana's bed was empty. Quickly reaching for her glasses, she stealthily tip-toed her way through the orphanage, the moon as pale as her face as she plodded down the stairs. As Meg snuck into the hall outside the library, she stopped at what she saw.

Mr. Hoffman's office door was closed. Inside, the light was on. She didn't dare peer through the keyhole, willing herself to turn away, full of misplaced bitterness that whenever she wanted her, Diana was never there. Instead, she could only leave her with frustration and a carefully-cultured menagerie of fantasies.

Meg crawled between the stained sheets, curling up and forcing her eyes to close.

"Baroness," Diana said, snatching her hand like a piece of candy. "Come with me to the lavatory."

in which I am useless

Thu, 06 Aug 2009 23:13:17 GMT

the rated-r meme;
➀ comment with a character of mine
➁ recieve three bits of trivia about their sexuality:
practices, preferences, experiences, fantasies, kinks, etc.
➂ Ask for any character from my fandoms and get the same.
➃ profit!

Characters include F (f_anatical), Z (z_ebroid), O (o_psimath), P (p_recious), Guillered (slaughterland), Himemiya Anthy (anthophyte), and Meg (countessistic ). If you want, you can ask for characters I haven't actually played anywhere: Takano Miyo (junegod) and Yuka (purgamentum).

Rule of Rose fic: Hide and Seek, Diana/Meg, PG-13

Fri, 31 Jul 2009 17:49:04 GMT

Title: Hide and Seek
Fandom: Rule of Rose
Rated: PG-13
Pair: Diana/Meg
Word count: 1,884
Summary: Meg plays hide-and-seek with Diana, while she plays a few tricks of her own.
Warnings: Diana being herself?
Disclaimer: I do not own Rule of Rose.
Notes: Oh hey, trying out a new fandom. Even though I haven't actually beaten the game. Written for justprompts, the prompt being Imogen Heap's Hide and Seek.

Hide and seek
trains and sewing machines
all those years
they were here first

oily marks appear on walls
where pleasure moments hung before the takeover,
the sweeping insensitivity of this still life

The window was smeared with fingerprints, foggy with breath--still smelling of the lukewarm stew served that evening, overboiled potatoes and wilted cabbage--for the purpose of awkward, crooked letters to be drawn on the white mist, reddened noses pressed up against the cold surface. There were cracks etched in the surface, around the splintery edges where the glass had been wedged into the building by some sloppy craftsman, and a chilly wind poured through the gap beneath the window, taking away just a little more warmth than before, threatening to snuff out the small, yellow flames that burned atop wax sticks.

Winter was a dreadful time for the orphanage, just dreadful. Outside, thick flakes of snow had been falling steadily for hours from grey, woolen-looking clouds, creating layers of ice upon doorframes and front gates, breaking off into sharp icicles that hung lethally off the roof and threatened to drop down on a child's head and lodge itself into an eyesocket at any time. Yes, most dangerous. None of the children had been allowed out; even if they bundled up in their warmest coats and booties, Clara would shoo them back inside before they died a horrible end from frostbite or some other silly excuse.

Inside was nearly as bitterly cold as outside. Their faces were all pale, splotches of red on their noses and gloves fitted over their fingers, the girls especially: Amanda was huddled with her sewing machine, her elephant knees knocking together from beneath that hideous pink floral skirt. Eleanor sat stoic at the foot of the stairs, watching her bird twitter an awful racket from inside the cage nearly as big as she, as if that fluttering mess of red feathers was a flame to keep her warm. Jennifer and her filthy beast was nowhere to be found, and Meg liked it that way.

And Diana, her Duchess, was sitting cross-legged in front of the warmest spot in the room, directly in front of a weak fire was beginning to blaze, sputtering into life after being coaxed by several bunched-up old newspapers. She was lying in such a way that if one wanted to rest next to her, they wouldn't feel any of the heat at all. And even if someone tried, Diana likely wouldn't stand for it. A snivelling Olivia, wearing the same baby-blue dress as always, had tried to crawl up next to her, only to be shoved away by the temperamental girl, her green eyes flashing in anger, the fire hissing as if mimicking her disgust.

And good for her, Meg thought. No one deserved to sit by Diana, or dare hog all the warmth.

However, some children with an extra few layers of clothing were most fascinated with something other than the fireplace. Like the small spruce tree, sitting rather lopsided in the center of the room. The branches were dry and snapped off with a satisfying crack, if Diana ever felt so inclined to feed the fire a bit more. The dark green needles fell like confetti, littering the dingy sheet wrapped around the base and the half-completed train tracks circling around it. Occasionally, a glass gold or red bauble was hung from the odd branch, giving it a very homely sort of appearance. It did have its charm, Meg had to admit.

Though, most young eyes were probably not on the tree itself, but the packages placed beneath it. Yes, as much as a sight the tree was to behold, it could hold naught a candle against the boxes beneath it, all dressed prim and proper in shiny, bright paper and frilly string bows. Some even had tags that read, To: Diana, or To: Clara, or even To: Eleanor, written in a familiar, wavering hand with blots of ink. Diana, of course, had not waited until the 25th, simply ripping her boxes open. Unfortunately, she was mildly unimpressed with her gifts, and had proceeded to wildly kick at all the other remaining presents. After being torn away from the tree, and she had been sent to Mr. Hoffman's for the day.

Now, Diana lounged by the fire, yellow light flickering off her striped skirt and green tie, illuminating her pale face and lowered eyelids, her pouting mouth and burgundy hair, recklessly tossed out of her face--Meg found herself having to turn away, clearing her throat and burying herself back in her notebook, noticing her crayon hand had faltered. For whatever reason, the winter cold had not reached her at all; she felt as warm as if she had been sitting by the fire all afternoon. How peculiar.

"Baroness."

Meg felt as if firecrackers were crackling up her spine at the simple word: an announcement of her rank, nothing more. Lifting her eyes from the scrawl of words she had scribbled on the page, she saw Diana's dark figure silhouetted against the fire. One pale had was waving, beckoning her to come closer. Meg quickly snapped shut her notebook in a rustle of loose papers, trying not to stumble forward as she heeded Diana's call, her pride seeming to melt away and slosh uselessly around inside her: a not altogether unpleasant feeling.

"Yes, Duchess?" She replied, her breath spilling from her in a white mist. How disgraceful! However, Diana merely wrinkled her nose slightly at the lingering smell of stew, and motioned for her to sit down. Meg hurried to do so, folding her legs beneath her and trying vainly to smooth the hem of her skirt down over her exposed gooseflesh knees, that were not covered by dark, cotton socks.

"I have a game for you to play." And it wasn't asking, it was telling her to do so. That was Diana: always fierce, always proud, always Meg's fond object of admiration.

"What game?"

"Hide and seek." Diana said, lying flat on her stomach, feet swinging in the air. Meg couldn't guess her expression, she was only given a glance at the rim of her ear and a snip of the other girl's nose behind long waves of hair. Habitually, she pushed the edge of her glasses higher upon the bridge on her nose, clutching her notebook to her chest.

"Of course. Would you prefer to be seeking this time?"

"Oh, yes." And here, a curl of a smile could be seen. "I'll come looking for you, Meg. I'll count to forty, then I want you gone. Ready? One, two..."

Meg got to her feet and scurried out of the room before she could hear Diana get to ten. Luckily for her, most of the orphanage was crowded in that one room, so no one like Xavier or Olivia could cheat and give away her location. But where to hide? Her room? Certainly not. The library? No, that would be the first place Diana looked. ...Hoffman's office?

Meg stopped in mid-sprint, rounding a corner, pressed tightly against the wall. The Headmaster's Office? Of course. Mr. Hoffman was probably down in the kitchens getting a hot cup of coffee or something along those lines, and even if he found her, it would be worth it if she could win this game with Diana. She knew, from experience, she often recieved little prizes for her victories: her best one had been a night spent in the same bed as the Duchess, even if the girl had brutally kicked her all night long, feigning sleep.

And so, Meg cautiously creaked open the door, padding across the carpet and crawling beneath the desk to wait for her pursuer.

"--what in the blazes?!"

Meg jerked awake at a familiar, eldery, most definitely displeased voice. Her neck was stiff from resting on her knees for so long, and her back was hunched painfully, but she still managed to scramble close to the floor and peer out from beneath the desk. Someone had opened Hoffman's door, and she could see the old man shaking his wrinkled head, occasionally gesturing with his cane angrily to the wall. Meg strained her eyes to see, and the way they widened immediately after, it would've been comic if it weren't for the severity of the situation.

Some child had taken her pens and crayons she most frequently used to write in her notebook with, and scribbled all over the wall. In bright streaks. In looping gushes of ink. Sometimes there were just thick blots, like they had taken a crayon and smashed as much colored wax as possible onto the wall. Furious jagged lines with no purpose scored along the wallpaper, ending with a finale of her used utensils dropped carelessly on the floor.

Horrified, Meg watched as Mr. Hoffman ground his dull teeth and placed his withered hands on his waist in frustration. She would be blamed for this mess! But who was the real culprit, and why? Surely Meg had not been too horrible to anyone as of late! Well...Jennifer didn't count, and anyway, she lacked the spine to do such a deed.

Her heart beat heavily and rapidly in her chest, Meg starting to realize that she could not hide under the desk forever. She had already been accused of a crime, and staying here wouldn't do her any good. She wrenched herself from the floor, peering out slowly from behind Hoffman's desk. Her shoes clattered nosily against the floor, despite her best efforts to keep quiet, and the Headmaster whipped his rotting old body around to stare at her.

"Meg!"

* * *

She returned to her room late evening, trying to not walk in such a way that would cause her skirt to brush against the tender, reddened skin where Hoffman's cane had smacked down upon her. To her great surprise and deep humilation, Diana was awake, lying in bed with a flickery candle, the flame casting light upon dark green eyes and pale cheeks. Meg's words were clogged in her throat as she lingered in the doorway. What could she do? Accuse her? No, certainly not.

"Don't just stand there." Diana said. She pulled back the blanket, to reveal she was already in her nightgown. "You did a good job hiding, Meg. I couldn't find you."

"But, Duchess--I was--" She was silenced by a shadowy wave of Diana's hand.

"No, I couldn't find you. I lingered outside Hoffman's for a bit, but you weren't there, Baroness. Now," She glanced to the empty space beside her in the narrow bunk. "You may reap your reward for an excellent game."

Meg remained in the doorway, injustice and shame swirling inside her still. She knew full well that the Duchess had been the one to pin the blame on her; she had seen those oily marks. And yet, she could not bring herself to do anything about it. Rather, on the contrary, she found herself scurrying back for more, always eager to make an impression on Diana's heart and find a place in her bed.

"Of course," She replied, her voice cracking only the slightest as she took off her shoes and crawled next to the other girl, curling up close to the warmth of her body, wishing so badly to feel her fingers stroking her hair.

"But tomorrow, I'd like to do the seeking."